Three weeks later:
“Laci and Tom I want to see your back handstand triple somersault pikes from the ten meter platforms and Chris I want to see your back two and a half somersault with two and a half twists from the three meter springboard” Andy says giving us our current dive assignments as the other divers went to the trampolines or gym.
The three of us began our trek up with concrete platform stairs; I was in the front followed by Chris and then Tom. Chris had more than likely secured his position in line in order to stop Tom from watching my butt as I bopped up the stairs. We made it up to the three meter springboards when I suddenly became nauseous. I stopped dead in my tracks, and bolted back down the stairs shoving both Chris and Tom out of my way with my left hand as I covered my mouth with my right. As soon as I reached the nearest trashcan, the contents of my stomach found their way out of my body as I gripped the edge of the can with my hands. I wanted to cry so badly: I hated everything about throwing up from the taste it left in my mouth to the burning feeling it cause in my throat. And on top of all that everyone’s eyes were now on me. I continued to stand hunched over the trashcan praying that nothing else would come up when I felt someone begin rubbing my upper back like my mother did when we were younger and got sick; the only person it could be was Chris.
“You okay Laci?” I turned my head to the left to see his worried face and shook it no.
“I need water” An utterly disgusted look flooded my face as the taste in my mouth started to form. I tried to go get my water from my bag but Chris stuck his hands on my shoulders and stopped me.
“Tom’s already getting it, just sit down” Within seconds of Chris’ statement Tom arrived carrying my water bottle. I instantly grabbed it from his hands and take a giant sip swishing it around my mouth and then spit into the trash can before chugging the rest of the bottle in an attempt to rid myself of the awful taste and the burn in my throat.
I tried to get up and was told to sit down again; everyone was acting like I just fucking passed out or missed my hands on a dive. “Guys seriously, I just threw up. I’m fine! I’m not injured! It’s nothing major.” But even after my pleading Andy made me go home from practice as a precaution in case I felt sick again. I stamped off to the locker room changed out of the suit and left.
The minute I got into my car I tried thinking of what could have even caused me to get sick: I wasn’t out drinking last night nor had I eaten anything that could have given me food poisoning. That’s when my brain started making connections between the events of the past couple of days and I began to panic: three weeks ago Tom and I had our little sleepover, I was now four days late with my period, which up until now I thought was from the stress of training, and now I had just thrown up. Those three things could only add up to one thing.
“Laci, what are you doing home?” My mother asks turning around from her seat at the kitchen table as I walk into the room.
“I got nauseous at practice so Andy sent me home” I quickly hide the little brown bag from CVS behind my back “I’m completely fine though so it’s completely ridiculous. I should be training. But now I’m just going to hang out in my room until everyone is done with practice and then go to Tonia’s party tonight” I faintly hear her say “Okay sweetie” as I darted up the stairs and slam the bathroom door behind me.
I put the brown bag down on the counter and began pacing back and forth from the window to the door and then from the door to the window. I was so afraid of what I could be told. I had finally hit my breaking point and my nerves began getting to me as I felt tears welling up behind my eyes; I sat down on the edge of the white porcelain tub with my face in my hands. “I can’t do this! I can’t do this!” I mumbled to myself: I was only seventeen I shouldn’t have to be going through this. I wanted so badly to call Tom but I knew I couldn’t do that because one he was at practice where I should be and two there was no need to worry him if there was no problem. Actually scratch that it was just because he was at practice, I had a gut feeling that we most definitely had a problem.
After about five minutes I finally got the courage to take the little pink box out of the bag. In a couple more minutes I managed to take the white stick out of the box, take the test and leave it on the counter to sit for three minutes.
“Please be negative, please be negative” as prayed as the alarm on my phone began to go off. I went to grab the test from the counter but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Two minutes later tears were rolling down my cheeks as I stared down at the test; there was a little pink plus.
Suddenly there was a knock on the bathroom door. “Laci, you in there?” It was Chris.
“Yeah, I’ll be out in a second” My voice shook and I hoped Chris wouldn’t notice. I threw the test and any evidence of it into the trash bin and covered them with toilet paper before wiping my eyes and walking out of the bathroom.
“You’re okay right?” I just nodded not wanting my voice to betray me. “You’re still coming to Tonia’s right?
“Of course I am” I put on a fake smile. “Let me know where you’re leaving”
*
I sat on Tonia’s tan sofa sipping my glass of water while everyone else was in the process of getting wasted. More than anything in this world I wished I could be having fun with all my team mates, but I was too busy worrying.
“Come on Laci, have a drink” Tonia says as she sits down next me with pleading eyes. “You don’t seem to be having any fun”
“Tonia I’m fine, and I just don’t want to chance getting sick again” She pouted at me. It completely kills me having to lie to her, but I just couldn’t tell her; the only person I needed to tell at this moment was Tom and he was completely M.I.A.
“Come on babe, you said you were fine at practice. It was probably just a freak accident” Tonia tried to reason with me “You can go sleep in my bed if you get sick, come on Lay I don’t want you to sit around alone being bored!”
“Tonia, I swear to you I will not sit around being bored all night, I’m just a little preoccupied at the moment” I stuck out my pinky for her to latch onto with hers. Keeping our pinkies linked we raised our hands and kissed the end closest to solidify our promise. It was very childish but it was something we always did “I’ll be back, I have to call Tom” I say as I get up and walk outside onto the front steps, the warm summer breeze blowing through my curly hair.
“Where the hell are you?” I whined as Tom answered my call.
“I’m pulling onto the block right now, why?” I could see the headlights of his Mini from where I was sitting on Tonia’s stoop.
“I just need to talk to you” I say before running to his car and hopping into the passenger seat. Tom unbuckles his seat belt and leans over to hug me.
“Lace, what’s wrong?”
I go to speak but no words come out, only the stream of tears I had been suppressing the entire night. Tom makes his way over the center console of the car and joins me in the passenger seat. He repositions us and I just sit in his lap and sob on his shoulder for what feels like forever. Tom just sits there one arm holding me tight against him while his other hand runs through my hair. “Shhh whatever it is, it’s going to be okay” Tom repeats over and over again in an attempt to calm me down.
My tears slowly subside but my breathing continues to be rigid “I’m…I’m...” I tried to speak but my tears come back again.
“Whatever it is Lace you can tell me” Tom kisses my forehead and tries to wipe away the current set of tears that roll down my cheek. “I love you”
I remove my head from the shoulder I had been clinging to and see the giant wet spot and makeup mess my tears left on his grey shirt. “Tom, I’m…” I close my eyes and take a deep breath “I’m pregnant”
I open my eyes just in time to see his jaw drop, a look of shock emerges onto his face.
