Perilous

Chapter 9 Feeling him part 1

I looked at the digital clock that was neatly set on the wooden table, the time read 3:00 am. I was laying down on my back, not covered by the blankets and still in my Treacherous uniform that I was in earlier today. I looked up at the bed above me and heard loud snores escape Peter's sleepy lips.

I couldn't sleep, it wasn't possible tonight. Not because of the snoring, but because of the on going thoughts flooding my mind. I had so much to think about, even though I shouldn't. I should only think to escape, and get back to Jamal. But I simply cannot. Marshall is holding me back, he's pulling me to stay and even if he doesn't tug strong enough, I still long to stay. To be with him.

I finally sat up on the bed, putting my boots on.

"You'll get caught if you walk out that door." I heard Tristan say.

I looked over to him. Although it was too dark in the room for me to see him, I could see his body movement in a way.

"Why are you up at this time?" I asked him, whispering.

I heard his bed squeak and the covers shuffle around. I can only guess he's sitting up as well right now.

"I'm always up at this time, every single day. I don't mean to be, just am."

I nodded my head. But then I realized he couldn't see me.

He continued to talk when he thought I didn't respond, "You hear Peter snoring up there?" He asked.

I looked above me, and said yes.

"Well, he snores when he's nervous for the next day. And technically it's the next day right now, so in a little bit, when the time hits 3:30 i'm going to have to wake him up so he can go to the messenger." He explains in a groggy morning voice.

"So, he's afraid?" I ask. I couldn't imagine Peter being afraid of anything. For only the few days I've know him, he seems to be the dare devil type of man. Not afraid of anything.

"Not afraid, just nervous. Peter, he's not afraid of anything. He just tends to over think things. You don't know us, Amira. You can't know us because you don't know yourself. And that's why your nervous all the time." He said.

His words took me by surprise. I know that I don't know what I want.
I don't know if I need to stay or go. What I also know is that I lost my self. I am gone, no where to be found.

"Tristan?" I start in a low whisper, "I-I don't know if I want to stay or leave. I don't know if I should stay or go back to Jamal. Tristan, I'm lost. And it's because of-"

"Marshall. I know." He said.

"What do you think of him?" He asked.

"He's arrogant and rude and an ass. But I know somewhere beneath him is a good guy. His blue eyes show so much emotion, it's hard not to fall in a trance. He cares, he has to, I've seen it. He-" I was going to go on, but Tristan cut me off.

"Amira, your a damn fool to think that. I'm sorry, but you are. Marshall? He doesn't give two shits about you! He wouldn't care if you were dead or alive before, why would he care now! Amira, I'm not trying to be the bad guy, but I'm not going to let you accidentally forgot who's the bad guy here. And it's Marshall. He's the bad guy who makes fun of people that die. You can't fall for his traps, that's exactly what he wants and I won't allow it Amira." He said with annoyance and anger laced in his voice.

I didn't get angry with him only because I knew he was half way right.  Although I've seen him; how he cares. But it's as if something clicks inside him and he's back to the most dangerous and wanted man in the states. Even the world.