Take You - Janoskians

Chapter 21

I curl up beneath my blankets and sniff myself. ugh. it's been 5 days since I last got out of bed other then food-or-toilet-wise. It's also, incidentally, been 5 days since I last contacted with Luke. Considerably not the last time he has contacted me, though. I sigh and pick up my phone, flicking through the latest texts that he had sent me.

"Baby I'm so sorry I didn't mean it. You know what I'm gonna do, I'm gonna come over and apologise to you so many times please don't be mad, love you x"

This was the first one. I didn't reply. I didn't answer the door, either. Thing is, I can't face him. Like yeah, Beau kissed me, (without my consent) and yeah, I apologised to Luke. But to know that he was harbouring that inside of him, thinking about me and his brother? To know that he was disgusted that I did that? It, well, it kind of makes me want to cry my insides out. Which I have done, admittedly, multiple times. It doesn't help that I don't want to see him, or talk to him, but I miss him, so much it hurts. I can't do anything. I'm in so much emotional pain I am making myself sick.

Then, the second text.

"Jess, I didn't mean it, I swear. I was just angry, love you xx"

And the third,

"Please answer the door, I need to talk to you, please. I love you. X"

And the fourth one, which had me in tears,

"Jess. Jess. Please, please, don't do this. I can't. No. You don't understand, I can't just let this be. Please answer me. Please.

I love you, so much."

And, the fifth.

"I miss you."

"Don't do this to me Jess, please, I'm so sorry. I promise you I didn't mean it. Please. I swear to God, if you don't talk to me soon I will go crazy. I love you x"

"Mum misses you. She got mad that I 'did that precious girl wrong'. She's right. I did do wrong, and you are precious. Jessamyn, I love you. Uncontrollably and I miss you."

And the last, desperate plea for forgiveness, or to see him, or to respond to him,

"I love you."

"I love you too, Lukey Poo." I whisper tearfully, using his once-hilarious nickname.

I sit straight up in bed as I hear a knocking on the door downstairs. Dad is out at work, either way he is under clear instructions not to let him in. "Jess," I hear, distant and sad. "Jess,"

I twirl around, pushing my face into my pillow and squeezing it, restraining from going down there and reaching for him and holding him close and breathing in his scent. The knocking ceases and I hear a choked whimper followed by a grunt and a thump, and I quickly flip the cover back to tiptoe downstairs and peek through the blinds. He's sitting against the wall of my house, breathing heavily with his head in his hands and his hands on his knees. His knuckle is bleeding and I suspect he has punched the wall in frustration. He looks so dejected, so sad and unkempt and lonely that I have to bite my knuckle to keep from letting out a rough sob. Suddenly he sighs loudly, gets up and walks away, and I slink away from the window.

'You're so fucking stupid, Jess.' my conscience tells me. 'Not to mention a pussy. It's either forgive him or get mad and forget him.'

But I can't seem to do any of that.

A/N: :'((((( comment for the next part (;

IF THIS CHAPTER GETS 6 VOTES AND 3 COMMENTS BY TONIGHT I WILL UPDATE TONIGHT.

SRSLY I have like up to chapter 30 written ill update!

6 votes, 3 comments

Love you guys x

- tee