home run >> jack gilinsky

10. things get better

i cant even sleep. i don't even know what just happened with jack. honestly he made me feel so bad. im not trying to do that to him. i looked down at my phone amd say a text in the group chat with jessa and carmen:
j< bryn did you and jack actually do it???
c< omg yeah!! did you? i saw him touching you at dinner i didn't even wanna say anything.
b> no. we were about to. again. i turned him down. he was like almost naked standing there and i just couldn't do it.
c< aww bryn
j< you left him hanging.
b> yeah i know but since its gonna be my first time i want it to be special not some last minute thing.
j< ok well when me and luke first did it it was in his room, amd we were "studying"
b> wow jess omg
c< i'd rather not explain me and noah's first time because tbh i dont even remember a lot about it. the parts i do remember are far too dirty to share.
b> you guys are so bad. when did this happen??
j< well im gonna be honest. it was 2 weeks ago.
c< 10th grade...
b> carmen!! dude you were like 16.
c< yeah but it felt right.
j< ok i need to vent something.
b> go for it.
j< when it happened, lukes mom was like 2 rooms away from us... after she asked me if we used protection. i didnt even know what to do.
c< did you know she was right down the hall??
j< yes. it just happened.
b> i need to take a shower and you my friends need to read the bible.
c< tell us when you and jack talk.
j< yeah i expect deatails.
b> yeah ok bye.
i got in the shower turned on my music and just stood there for a while. what if i lost jack. i don't know what i'd do with out him at this point. he's my rock. i finished showering and got out. i looked at my phone. jack. dammit. hes the last person i wanna talk to right now. im gonna open the message but if i dont feel like i need to respond, im not going to.

< listen babe. im honestly so sorry. i over reacted like really over reacted. i wanna make it up to you and show you how much i want you. please give me another chance.
>aww babe i know im sorry too. i understand, youre a teenage boy. the hormones took over and you couldn't control your self . it happens all the time. i love you
< i love you more princess
> and i just wanna let you know that when the time is right it will happen. im talking within the next few months.
<stop. dont mess with me like that.
> i need to sleep. i love you
<love you

i just told him it was gonna happen. soon. what was i thinking...

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
i keep hittin you with that double update
fr things are getting heated in here. ok i
really need to sleep. bye.
<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<