We Aren't Nerds! {{PETEKEY}}

{{9}}

Of course Gerard had nothing against Pete, he was a good kind of person, but he could tell that he wasn't the right kind of person for Mikey. He was worried that his little brother wouldn't be able to see that, though.

Mikey was too busy thinking about the best way to apologise to Pete to even consider the good points Gerard was making. He saw where his older brother was coming from, but he couldn't listen, he didn't want to. Most of his still thought Pete was practically perfect, even if it was difficult. He really regretted falling for him, but he had.

"If he yells at you again... " Gerard said, "If he upsets you again... You have to tell me, okay?"
"He's not going to," Mikey insisted, "it was all my fault, I was being rude and--"
"Mikey. If he upsets you again, you are going to tell me, okay?"
Mikey hesitated to agree, but he did, he had to, "Okay..."

Gerard smiled and left Mikey to go and do whatever he needed to do. He didn't have much to do, and seeing Pete's number in his phone tempted him a lot, but he left it. He didn't want to make matters any worse for Mikey.

Mikey also saw Pete's number in his phone, but he gave into the temptation much easier. It was just a simple text, 'I'm sorry', but it meant so much more to Mikey than it would to Pete, or anyone else, for that matter.

Pete texted back fairly quickly, but he didn't sound like he wanted to talk. Nevertheless, Mikey carried on.

M: I'm sorry
P: I know you are
M: I need to make it up to you, properly I mean
P: You don't, please don't
M: What do you mean?
P: Just leave me and Patrick alone, okay? I still want to hang out with you, but just with you

Mikey had no idea what that really meant. It messed with his head a little bit too much, and he had a feeling he might have to talk to Gerard about Pete way sooner than he'd anticipated.  Still, he carried on texting Pete.

M: What does that mean, though?
P: I want to be your friend, Michael, I just don't want you to come between me and Patrick
M: I want to know you, I really, really like you (it's not a 'squish I promise)
P: oh
P: That's a shame, I'm sorry
M: Pete, please don't hate me

Pete didn't text back, he couldn't. He didn't know what to say to Mikey, or Michael as he'd insisted he called him again. He was trying his best to understand why Michael liked him. If he'd known him longer then he wouldn't have been as confused, but he didn't understand why the other boy really liked him so much.

Pete rolled over on his bed, and into the wall of pillows he'd built only a few minutes earlier. He told himself he was shielding himself from everything around him, but that was just him being stupidly philosophical. He was simply trying to enjoy being warm and cosy in the comfort of his own bed. It wasn't too often he just sat in bed.

Pete couldn't admit it to Mikey, but he'd gone home straight after he had. He never meant to leave Patrick, but he had done. He hated knowing he'd made Mikey feel so terrible, and he had to leave Patrick because of it.

Pete felt like he really needed to text Mikey back. He knew he owed him that much, at least.

P: I'm never going to hate you, Michael Way, I'm sorry

It was a reply five minutes later than Mikey had wanted, but it was a reply nonetheless.

M: Really? Are you sure, because you didn't show that too well
P: I mean it, I don't hate you at all
M: How are you going to prove that to me

Pete had to think about his answer carefully. He knew what Mikey was trying to say, but he couldn't.

P: Michael... Don't make it awkward, please
M: What? I didn't say anything! How are you going to make it up to me?
P: What do you want me to do?

Mikey knew what he wanted, and he knew Pete knew as well. He didn't know what to say, especially knowing he couldn't tell Pete what he really wanted. It wasn't like it was a secret, but he didn't want to repeat it again.

P: Michael? I'm not sure what you want from me
M: You know what I really want, but I can't have it and I'd rather not have it if you don't want it too
P: I'm sorry, I'm not saying I'll never want it I just don't want it now
M: Okay, I'll keep that in mind

Mikey didn't like how his last text sounded, but he couldn't take it back after he'd sent it. He wanted Pete to like him, but really like him and not feel guilt-tripped into it. He didn't feel like he was guilt-tripping Pete, but he felt like Pete thought he was. It was frustratingly confusing, but Mikey was learning to live with that feeling.

Pete didn't like how Mikey's last text had sounded, either. He knew Mikey wanted him to like him, and he was starting to wish he did. He liked Mikey, he really did, just not in the way he wanted him to. It was upsetting for both of them, Pete knew Mikey was upset about it, and Pete hoped Mikey knew he didn't want to upset him.

Pete rolled himself in his duvet again, he knew Mikey wasn't going to text him again for a while. He needed to talk to someone else, just to take his mind off it, but he wasn't sure who he could turn to. He thought about Patrick, but he didn't think that would help too much. He remembered how Joe and Andy didn't seem to like him anymore, which narrowed his options even more. He scrolled through his contacts, but none of them appealed.

Eventually Pete settled for Gerard. He didn't think it would go down too well if Mikey had said anything, but he was the only person left who he felt like he could really turn to. It wasn't like they were best friends, but that was okay.

P: I need someone to talk to, what's up?
G: I don't think you should talk to me, I'm still kind of off you at the moment
P: Did Michael tell you what I said?
G: Yeah he did, he likes you a lot more than I think you realise, he was practically crying earlier
P: But so was I! I do like him just not they way he likes me, it's difficult

Pete hated explaining the same thing over and over again. At first it was just to himself, then to Mikey, and now to Gerard. He really did like Mikey, but it wasn't in that way, and it couldn't be in that way while he was so desperate.

He didn't feel like he'd only known Mikey for just over a day, there was a lot between them, even if it was in such a short amount of time. Pete rarely connected to people, so he felt like Mikey had to be special to him in some way, even if he didn't know it yet. Like he'd already said, he liked Mikey, but not in that way.

G: Have you told him that?
P: I can't... I'm worried that he'd think that means more than it does
G: What does he mean to you, then?
P: More than Andy and Joe, but not as much as Patrick
G: Be nice to him, he's only little, even if he is taller than everyone else I've ever met

Pete smiled at Gerard's last text. It was easy for him to forget that Mikey was actually younger than him. He didn't act it, and didn't really look it, but, when he thought about it, it was almost obvious.

P: Can you tell him I really am sorry? He deserves to physically hear it from another person
G: Call him and tell him yourself, he's still just lying in his room playing CDs a little too loud

Pete didn't need anymore invitation than that. He closed his messages and went to his calls instead. He only had to wait a few seconds before he heard Mikey's voice on the other end, answering the phone.

M: "Hello? What's up?"
P: "Not too much, I just needed to speak to you."
M: "Go on then, I'm all ears."
P: "I am completely and entirely sorry for anything I've said that's upset you. Gerard also said you were crying, so I'm sorry about that, too."
M: "Don't be, it's okay, honestly, I'm alright now."
P: "I cried too--"

After hearing that, Mikey put the phone down instantly. It wasn't that he didn't care about Pete, because he definitely did, he just didn't want to hear his sob story. He considered yelling down to Gerard, and asking him why he'd been speaking to Pete, but it wasn't really his business. They were friends before Mikey had ever met Pete, after all.

"Mikey?!" Gerard yelled, "Did Pete call you?"
Mikey sighed before answering, "Yes, he did. Why do you care?"
"I told him to call you, are you okay?"
"I'm fine, Gerard, honestly. I'm going to be fine."
"Do you want some toast?"
"Yeah, okay, thanks."