Study Break (sequel to INTS) calum hood fanfic

You Will Always Be His

Listen to the music it helps...

all you need is him, that is all you will never need in life. Without him, you will do something stupid. you need him, and right now you need him more than ever.

*recape*

Once I reached Nick, I looked over to Calum who was trying his best to smile, “thank-you” I mouthed. It was true; he has helped me though everything, I was making a life decision right now. When Nick said his vowels, it really did help me make up my mind.

Yes.

 I wanted to do this. I wanted to get married.

“Do you take Jess to be your wedded wife?” the priest asked,

“I do” Nick smiled at me, I looked into his green eyes, seeing Calum out of the corner of my eyes. He looks so torn up, why did he come today? We haven't talked in years, but truley, I don't care. I just happy that he is here. Here with me, seeing me get married. I am happy about that... Right? yes... I am?

“Do take Nick to be your wedded husband” he asked me,

I quickly looked over to Calum, yes I wanted to this, I wanted to get married, “I d... I can’t” I let go of Nicks hands; I just didn’t want to get married to Nick. He looked at me shocked, sadness and anger in his eyes. He looked over to where I was looking. Calum. Anger built up inside him, he quickly brethed out, figuring out what was going on. “I’m sorry Nick” I whispered before turning around and running away. One of my bride’s maids were following me. I just humiliated myself in front of all of those people. I was scared of someone stopping the wedding, when I was the one that stopped it. I just wanted this all to be a dream, where I can wake up and I will be in Calums arms again. When we were 16. We were 16 and happy, together. 

“Jess, Jess what’s wrong?” my friends were asking though the door. Why can't people just understand that I don't want to be around them, the door was locked for a reason. I heard someone mumble something before they all left.

“Jess babe, open up” straight away I knew it was Calum’s voice. I ran over to the door and opened it up. He quickly walked in, closing the door behind him. “What just happened?” he asked pain in his voice. I quickly hugged him pulling him close, I need him right now. I needed him by my side. I’ve needed him by my side for the past 5 years. I was an idiot for letting him go the first time, and the second time I must have been blind. But third time lucky, right? There is no way I'm ever letting him go again. He's in my life and, truley, that is all I need to be happy. I just need Calum.

“I’m so sorry” I cried onto his shoulder, holding him tighter. He was mumbling encouraging words into my ear, running his fingers up and down my spine, calming me down. He always did that. Running his fingers up and down my spine to calm me down.

“Now tell me what just happened” he pulled away from the hug, once I finally calmed down. We sat on the couch in the room, my legs were over his, his arms around my waist, so I always almost sitting on his lap, my head and hands rested on his chest, feeling his heartbeat, his breathes. Just feeling him there. That way all I needed. He sat in silence, waiting for me to talk.

"I couldn't marry him, knowing you were right there" I whispered into his eyes, the brown eyes I've missed for the past 5 years. His eyes, full of confusion but at the same time so much love. They eyes I can see my future with. The eyes I can see myself walking up to seeing. The eyes I have loved ever since I was 15. The eyes that I can't live without.

“I… I didn’t mean for you to stop the wedding because I came, I'm so sorry” he said sounding shocked, 

“No, it’s not your fault.” I tried to give him a weak smile. Maybe it was a little, but it was a good fault. A fault that made me see what I want in my life. A fault that I can and I want to live with. All of Calums's faults, they can't be faults, they are too beautiful to be faults. They are the kind of faults that you want in your life. The kind of faults that make you see the good things in your life. The kind of faults that make you see you are marrying the wrong person.

“Jess, can I ask you something?” he asked, before there was a knock at the door, Nick walked in.

“I need to talk to you Jess” he said, looking at Calum, eyeing him down. Calum took a deep breathe in, before looking over at me, making sure that I was okay. 

“Okay” I whispered, moving my legs away from Calums so he can stand up. Calum stood up and walked past Nick, eyeing each other, “please just stop it!” I yelled at him, “Stop making this harder than what it already is” I slapped my hands down onto the dress. Calum nodded his head, gave me a weak smile before walking out of the room.

“Nick” I started, I heard him sigh, sitting on the chair, across the room, “I’m so sorry” I truley was.

“No matter how you feel, I will never be able to have you. Even if I marry you, you will never be completely mine” he shook his head, putting his head in his hands. “You will always be Calums. I could do everything, but you will never love me the way you love Calum” he bought his head up again. “No matter what I do” he whispered. “I could force you to marry me, I could make Calum to get sent away, I could make you not see each other ever again, and you will still never be mine! You will always be Calums!” he started to get angry,

“I’m sorry Nick, I really am, I wish I knew sooner” I cried even harder,

“No, you’re not sorry. But that… that’s okay…. Because if I love you enough, I will let you do whatever makes you happy, even if that means being with a different guy” he shook his head, standing up and walking over to the door.

“You will find someone who is worth so much more than me, someone you would die for. That will be her. And when you find her…” I paused, “I hope you will understand more of my decision” I cried,

“I guess this is good-bye then” he said,

“I guess so” I gave him a small smile.

“Can I just do one last thing, so we don’t end on a bad note?” he asked, walking over to me and taking a seat next to me. I nodded my head. He put his hand to my cheek and kissed me.

The last kiss I will ever have with the wrong man.

“Is there anything that I can do, to change your mind?” he asked, pulling away from the kiss, I shook my head, “well then… I guess this is bye” walking to the door, “good bye Jess”

“Good bye Nick” and with that he walked out of my life.

I sat in my room by myself for a little while longer before my mum came in. “oh sweetie” she came up to me, “Calum’s a good boy, you know that” she hugged me tightly, “there will be a next time for this, you will have the right man with you that time” she stayed with me until I finished crying.

Calum came back into the room again; we went straight into each other’s arms. “I love you so much” I whispered, holding him closer,

“I love you too” he whispered, pulling away, finally meeting the lips again that I’m meant to be with. “Marry me?” he asked, strongly saying ‘me’, I froze, of course I wanted to marry him, but come on… I just walked away from getting married an hour ago, “I mean not now… but still… Marry me?” he froze, waiting for an answer,

“Yes you idiot” I laughed, kissing him

“Now let’s get you home and all cleaned up okay? Movies and ice-cream tonight?” he smiled,

“Perfect” I whispered, pulling him in for another hug.

After all we have a whole 5 years of cuddling we have to catch up with.

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I'M SO HAPPY!!!!!!! *cue the awwww's* yeah... i think its cute...

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