Finnick and Annie

Goodbye

Annie wasn't exactly reassuring. Then I remembered that she was the one that was going to go into the arena the following day, and that I had to be the one comforting her.

"Sorry," I whispered. "I freaked out..."

"It's fine, Finn," she said, "I know the feeling. I watched you in your games, remember?"

"Yeah..." I nodded. "Let's get some rest, okay?"

"Alright," she said. She stood up from the bed, and tried unsuccessfully to unzip her dress.

"Need some help with that?" I chuckled and helped her, exposing the smooth skin of her back.

"Thanks."

I turned around to let her change, while I unbuttoned my own shirt.

"You're silly," she said.

"How so?" I asked.

"You see naked women all the time. You've seen me in a bathing suit, and honestly, nobody seems to think nudity is a big deal over here. I thought you might used to it by now."

"I... Well..." I looked at her and blushed; she had dropped her gown to the ground and was standing there in her underwear. I watched as she slid a T-shirt over her head, then quickly looked away. The image was burned in my head, though. Her pale skin, scrubbed and polished by her prep team, seemed to glow in the dim room.

She was right. I had seen a lot of naked women, even if reluctantly. The one I had seen that morning had promised to sponsor Annie generously in exchange for my company. The two of them couldn't have been more different. Capitol women had so much money, they spent years in pursuit of unattainable perfection. This particular one had gone to an extreme with her particular combination of tattoos and cosmetic surgeries.

It just wasn't the same. Annie Cresta from District Four, whom most people would overlook, was the very definition of perfection in my eyes. Her exposed skin did things to my heart that nobody else could manage.

"All done," she said. I turned to look at her again, and hoped my blush wasn't too noticeable. I finished taking off my shirt, then stripped off my pants and replaced them with loose-fitting pajama bottoms. She chuckled and got in bed, pulling the covers up to her neck.

"What are you laughing at?" I asked, as I crawled in next to her.

"You're cute when you blush," she whispered in my ear, which of course, only made me blush even more.

"Very funny."

"Finnick?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you find me attractive?" she asked. Her cheeks now matched my own.

"What?" I frowned, "Of course, I do."

"You're not only saying that because you're my boyfriend, right?"

"No," I assured her. "Why are you asking this?"

"I don't know... you've seen so many of the Capitol's most beautiful women. I must be pretty dull in comparison."

I scoffed, slightly outraged. There was no contest. Nobody else held a candle to her in my eyes.

"Sorry, it's just that... you've slept with so many of them, but you've never seemed interested in doing that with me." The conversation was clearly uncomfortable, and she struggled to meet my eyes.

"It's not because I didn't want to," I assured her.

"Why then?" she asked, clearly unwilling to drop the subject. I guess I couldn't blame her given how little time she had left to ask.

I sighed and brushed back a loose strand of her hair. "I didn't think you were ready. Especially with... me having to come here. I just wanted to make sure it was the right time, you know? That you were sure it's what you wanted."

She bit her lip and nodded.

"Finn?" She looked at her hands and fumbled with her fingers nervously.

"Yes?"

"I want to do it," she whispered.

"What?" I was really caught off-guard. I thought she was kidding for a moment, then I thought she was just trying to prove herself, but then she looked at me, with those eyes I adored, and I knew she was serious.

"I know what you're forced to do. It was definitely upsetting at first—it still is. But it's not because I'm jealous or anything... I know I'm the one you really want, even if they get to have you too," she whispered, tears started to form in her eyes. "I don't want to go in there with any regrets. I want to know what it's like to be that close, Finn," she said and wiped away a rogue tear. "This could be our last chance. And please, don't try to deny it—"

Her words cut deep. I didn't want to think about her dying, so I kissed her to push those thoughts away. Annie pulled me closer and kissed me urgently.

In all of the years I'd known her, of course I'd thought about what it would be like. Even after sex became a thing that I dreaded, I still imagined how refreshing it would be as long as it was with her. But in none of my daydreams did I imagine it might finally happen when we had to say goodbye. Our first time together could possibly be our last, and while half of me wanted to scream and cry at the thought, the other, hungrier half of me took over me. I held her and kissed her and moved even closer to her, but even when every inch of our bodies were touching, it didn't feel like enough.

And though I was unfortunately extremely familiar with the mechanics of sex, that night felt like a first; it was unlike anything I'd ever experienced before

We woke up the following morning, still tangled with each other. My arms had held her close through the night, and her leg was wrapped over mine. We were both still naked, and the only thing concealing us was a thin blanket.

"Love," I whispered in her ear. "Time to wake up." Time to go into the arena. Time to watch children murder each other. I reminded myself that the calmer I acted, the calmer Annie would feel. I didn't want to fill her with my bitterness and dread before she entered the arena.

She stirred and gave me a sleepy smile. "'Morning, Finny."

I kissed her head and sighed. "We should get ready."

She frowned and snuggled closer to me. I held her, forcing myself to keep it together. After another minute of silence, she pulled away and left for the bathroom.

"So, I guess this is it," I whispered as Celia entered the dining room.

"What do you mean?" she asked. "Aren't you taking me to the arena?"

"No, Anne, the stylist does that,"

She jumped from her chair, almost knocking it over. Mags and Caspian tried their best to look away, but I could feel the pity in eyes of everybody who'd spent time with us over the last few days.

Annie rushed to hug me; I held her in a tight embrace and whispered empty reassurances in her ear.

I held her by the shoulders and looked her in the eyes, repeating everything I had taught her over the last few days, hoping that any of it would stick and make a difference when she was in there.

We shared a brief but passionate kiss, then Celia was dragging her away. "Wait!" I yelled. They both turned to look at me and I ran to her side. "I almost forgot this." I dug around my jean's pocket and pulled out a round, silver locket and slid it over her head. "To remind you what you're fighting for."

She opened the locket and stared at the two pictures I had placed there. One was of her father, smiling with a younger Annie in his arms, and the other was a picture of both of us. In that one, Annie was smiling at the camera while I kissed her cheek.

"Thank you," she whispered, and clutched the locket tightly in her hand. Then she was gone.