Queen Bitch's Adventures

Parents again

Still can't get over the fact that my child is named "Salad" thank you Pebble for you're creativity. 

Dawns Pov

I woke up around ten in the morning and rolled out of bed. I stopped for a moment and prayed that the house wasn't trashed. I came down stairs and saw no one there.
"But..." I mumble to myself. The house was totally clean. I ran back upstairs. Salads room was totally empty. Wait what? No knives? No anything. Just her bed and some clothes on the floor. It was too quiet. No music playing. No Salad screaming nothing.
"Ack!" I say and start running around looking for signs that people other than me live here.
"Where did you go...?" I ask myself looking around. I rush to the phone.
"PEBBLE WHERE DID THEY GO!?!" I yell as soon as she picks up. 
"If by they you're referring to salad and Ruby, I was told I don't have permission to tell you." Pebble says and hangs up.
"RUDE!" I gasp. I immediately call Tyler.
"Do you knew where everyone in my house went?!" I say anxiously into the phone.
"Yeah Ruby called to tell me he was taking Salad to the strip club," Tyler responds.
"Wait... Why would Ruby call you?" I ask myself allowed.
"He didn't but if he did I would have personally gone over and whipped his ass," Tyler says.
"Sounds like you, bye bye," I say and hang up.
"AAAGGGHHHH!" I scream at the top of my lungs. I knew I was unorganized but I didn't know I couldn't keep track of my husband and my demon child!
They couldn't just leave... Could they? Nonononono! This can't be happening! They can't leave! Wait... Why if Ruby was leaving would he take Salad with him? Nobody likes Salad not even him. Or does he? Eh... I check my phone for probably the third time aaaaaannnnnnddddd same result no new messages. I text pebble.
No seriously do you know where they went?
I sit waiting for a reply.
Nuh uh look for a note or some shit!
So there I am running around my house again looking for a note on the floor on the counter like ugggghhhh nothing!
Can't find anything
Have you tried asking him? 😂
This seems like such a game like... Does this happen? I send to him:
Where did you go? I'm worried...
Every second that goes by feels longer than the last when my dear neighbor Tyler knocks on the door.
"Umm hi?" I say answering the door. "Why are you here?" I ask.
"I thought it was about time for your daily reminder," he says.
"Of what?" I ask shaking my head kind of angry at his timing.
"You're husband sucks, you could do better, you're child is a murderer, you failed at life," He says and I slam the door. Finally Ruby texts back. It might have been good that Tyler came then because I wasn't thinking of it.
Ask the coffee machine.
Wait what? Coffee machines don't talk... Anyway, I get my ass up and walk back over to the kitchen. I started pulling apart the coffee machine and there inside is a note. Wow self.

Dawn,
I took Salad to the store with me so she didn't trash the house again. We should be back around 12.
Love you,
Ruby

#my character will be the stupidest person alive