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I was drunk.
The stranger on the phone hadn't replied yet, and it was well into the night now - or was it morning? It was still dark outside, but my phone was showing single, blaring numbers that blurred and trembled. I didn't like to drink, especially now, when the fog it threw over me reminded me of lying drugged in a van with a bag on my head, Tyler comatose next to me as we were delivered to the Family like parcels.
Even as the unease tugged at me, I kept drinking. I didn't want to remember just how much I'd failed to rescue Tyler. How he probably hated me now and had a right to.
As the hours ground down, my mouth tasted like cheap alcohol and sand. I tipped my head back, watching the shadows grow and scramble up the walls to the ceiling, and tried to make sense of the tangle of memories shouting for attention in my brain. There was Tyler on the first day I met him, on our first date, on the first night we fooled around. Not enough. I needed something more recent.
Tyler bloody. Bruised. Coughing and -
I winced, my hand shaking a little, and the bottle swinging dangerously towards the ground. I took another gulp and closed my eyes, pleading for something more - and received it.
Tyler was there, as long as I kept my eyes shut. He was bending down to take the bottle from my hand - I heard it drop - and kiss me softly, feather light. I shivered as he took my hands and and squeezed them gently, and could almost feel his sigh on my neck, his breathing easy and full and nothing like the fast, fractured wreck it had been last time I'd seen him.
"I will forgive you one day," he whispered, and the ring of the phone shattered the dry air and my beautiful, beautiful illusion.
SHORT IM SORRY IM A VERY BUSY BEAN
YOU ARE READING
The Good Life ~ Troyler AU
Fanfic"You've never changed, have you? No matter how much you've tried to outrun it. You'll always end up here, and you'll always end up a monster, Troye Sivan."
