The Deceased

Chapter Nineteen-State of mind

"His time to die?" Jane gives a bitter laugh. "I don't even know what to say to that. This just keeps getting more stupid."

She stands, appearing fresher than she was in Lynx's house. I don't know if she gave herself a much needed pep talk, or she watched some daily Dr. Phil, but i'm surprised by this new attitude, although it's too soon to say if I relatively like it.

"That's not all." I watch her push her lips together. "When I got home the knife was gone. Stolen."

"The knife you found in the forest?" She asks, shaking her head in bewilderment at my nod. "Who would do that?"

"I'm 110% sure it was Vlad. I mean, he's obviously pissed that I took it in the first place..." My voice trails into a murmur, "and I sort of stabbed him."

"Wait," Jane holds her breath before letting out an unsure chuckle, as if she's not sure she heard me correctly. "You what?"

"Yeah, I stabbed him. I had to, i'm pretty sure he was going to kill me. It was me or him... I swear I've told you this before."

She gives a shrug and sits back on her bed, heaving a sigh that sounds heavy with burden. "Well, did it hurt him?"

I think back to that night. Did it even hurt him? I remember the feeling of plunging it into his chest. It was harder than I expected - really hard, actually- like pushing a door that says pull. Nevertheless, it went in, and i'm sure it hurt, but before my very eyes he waved it away like it was just a flesh wound.

"I don't think so, but I know he hated me. He definitely stole the knife, and he went into my house to get it." Meaning he knows where I live. I don't know how he found that out, but my house is not as safe as it used to be.

"Lets hope he doesn't take that to his advantage, hey?"

I look at Jane, frowning at her sudden lack of interest in this conversation. Did she not want me to come over and tell her this?

"Is there something wrong?" I ask, rolling onto my stomach and flicking my legs into the air.

Jane looks at them like I just stole the last slice of pizza. "What?"

"Nothing," she turns away before baring her teeth in a look of disgust. "I'm just thinking about school."

Oh, school. It was something I almost completely disregarded from my life since Jeans murder. "What about it?"

"For starters, Val, I think it's a stupid idea for you to be ditching everyday, and I don't think it's right for you to be dragging me down with you-"

"Woah." Where did that burst of anger come from? Suddenly it was me who was angry that she would even suggest that's what my intention was; for Jane to miss school because I am. "I've never told you to ditch school. Everyday that you don't go is your decision. Don't try to pass the blame on to me."

I expected an apology, like the regular Jane would have, along with a look of guilt and a lowering of her head. But she just scoffs. "I saw Mr Bell. He says I'm failing, and he says it's almost impossible for me to get my attendance back up. I can't fail, Valerie. We had a plan to go to university- even sent in our forms. I was accepted but I won't get that recommendation from Mr Bell and all my teachers if I fail. Have you gotten your form back yet?"

"No," I say, not because I haven't been accepted, but because I haven't checked the mailbox yet. "I'm sorry you're failing, but it has been a hard-"

"It's not about Jean, okay? I'm sick of things always being about him. I can't wallow in my own tears forever, okay, I need to do something about it. So stop bringing up Jean. I want to stop hearing about his murder. It's all this town talks about, it's all over the news."