Life as I Know It

Chapter 15

A/N: Thanks for the feedback for the last chapter! Lot of you want Bella to quit and move on, and you love Angela. Thanks for the tips! And thanks to April (aka fyrebirch89) for editing.

Previously...

"Ok, ok I'll go but you don't have to." She unlocked the door and opened it again. She turned back around and gave me a hug. I felt my body freeze then warm up to her warm arms. "You do what you want. And do what you like. If anything, we should hang out more."

I smiled sadly, the tensions of my job status hanging over my head again. "Thanks, Ang."

I watched her leave, leaving me to my thoughts once again.

~oOo~

My mind felt calmer after talking with Angela about Stacey's criticisms of my work.

I didn't want to leave so soon, but I didn't know what else to do to improve my performance. And if they didn't want to give it to me, then maybe I should have left. I'd have to think about it some more, but I couldn't do it here.

I walked out of the back office and met up with Stacey again.

She was discussing a membership with a customer, and I waited until she was done. I smiled nervously as I walked by.

"I don't think I want to stay. If I'm not doing well, then I don't want to hold you guys back by, you know, not putting my whole heart into my work." My voice stayed strong, but my mind still felt freaked out.

She sighed, her mouth pulled down into a frown, but her eyes were patient and understanding. "Ok, then. You'll have to finish out your last shift for today, and then your letter of resignation, when I get a hold of it next week." Her eyes turned sad for a moment. "I'll be sad to see you go. You're one of the sweetest workers I've had."

I felt the disappointment go from her eyes to my heart. "Yeah, well...It wouldn't be right to stay if I wasn't working to my full potential."

She nodded, and I walked around her to the back rack to put back clothes and dolls.

Angela's curious eyes found me, and I just shrugged in defeat. She shrugged too and kept working. We'd definitely talk later when I left.

Trying to keep my emotions at bay, I kept working until the end of my shift. I still helped out customers, put stock up, and assisted with my co-workers and other sales managers. I don't think anyone besides Angela knew I was leaving the next week, which was good because I didn't need a pity party for being the weakest team member. Things would be difficult at home. What would my parents and Edward think? How would I find another job in the summer, where the season was closed and kids from all over would be applying?

Five o'clock rolled around, and I signed off for the last time. I took off my Disney apron and badge, and put them both in the bucket along with everyone else's. My eyes wandered to it, taking in the warm fabric of the apron and the badge that held my name as an associate. Maybe sales and retail wasn't for me. Maybe I had a problem with people. Maybe people had a problem with me, and authority.

I had to leave here before I started to cry and then I really wouldn't be able to leave. I wiped the corner of my eye as I grabbed my bag and walked out. Before I made it out the front door, Tanya pulled me over to check my bag.

"I'm sorry things had to go like this, Bella. I hope you find something better for you." She smiled a bit, but there was still some concern in her eyes.

I nodded and kept my head down. "Thank you."

Angela came up behind her and gave me a hug. I looked back at Stacey, and she narrowed her eyes towards her and walked to the back of the store.

Angela pulled me back and I felt a crumpled Post-It note in my hand. I opened it and saw scribbled notes of her number.

I smiled, feeling more tears in my eyes. "Ang, I already have your number."

"I know, but this is just in case, you know?" She smiled sadly.

I nodded. "Thanks. I'll see you."

"Let me know how the boyfriend takes it," she called behind me.

I looked back and laughed.

Walking to the food court upstairs, my mood went from sad to scared at the thought of Edward and my parents finding out about today.

I knew my mom would be okay with it, but my dad might take some time to get over it. When I'd told him earlier last year that I'd wanted to take a break from school after I'd graduated community college, he was concerned at how much I'd miss out on later. He'd thought that I wouldn't want to go back, or that I would find something more important than my education. And it wasn't like that; I wasn't running away from anything, I just needed my mind to settle in and take a break. I thought it was important to rest and do other things other than school. And I'd went back a year later, but now I had no job again. I had a seasonal job last Christmas season, but even when that was over, I was back in the same hole. And even when I wasn't doing whatever, I was still planning on going back.

Now that I was jobless again, I had to do some serious thinking of what I wanted. What did I want to do? Where did I want to go? How would I get there? Who would I take with me, or would I go about this alone?

My dad, Charlie, and I had a good relationship, but since he lived states away, I felt like he and I only had that good, separate relationship, much unlike me and my mom. Same with my sister Rosalie, who lived in California. She visited for holidays and birthdays, but the minute she graduated high school, she'd packed up her bags and left to study theater. Which in my opinion, was just as unstable and up-in-the-air as being a writer was. She and my mom had had countless arguments about it. But that was her dream, so she did it. I'd seen a couple of her plays on Youtube, and she was very good, and I was happy for her. I just wished I had that. Not the acting, I could never do that. I didn't have the face nor the intelligence for being in front of the camera. But I wished I had that inner confidence that she and my mother had.

My phone buzzed, pulling me out of my thoughts as I ate.

Hey, you done yet? - E

I held my breath as I typed. Yeah, just finished. You're here already? - B

Yeah, I'm around the corner. Where in the mall are you? - E

Food court. - B

Ok, I'll park and meet you there. - E

Sure, okay. - B

I locked my phone and put my face in my hands. I didn't think he'd be too angry, but I hated if my hopelessness affected our relationship so early.

What would happen next?

A/N: What should happen next? What do you think Edward or Renee will think? What would you do, as a parent or girl/boyfriend? Review, favorite, and share.

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