The Tears of Sorrow and Joy (Ereri fanfic)

End of the Beginning

We headed back to the Recon Corps castle after a long threatening mission. Losing 20 plus members, it was hard to call this a victory. I must look ahead though a force keeps pulling me back. Captain Levi, flanked by Petra and Gunther looks back to see if I'm still following him. Through his gaze I sense some unknown feeling stir inside of me. His strong shoulders that have been built up over the years reflect the light making a halo around his head. I can't describe this odd feeling, and don't want to. Before I can relish this feeling, Levi sees that I'm still following him, turns around and urges his horse into full gallop.

We all follow his lead. Armin and Jean write up on my left side with Marco following behind them.

" Hey! Eren!" Jean shouts trying to get my attention. Armin sits holding onto Jean's also looking like tomorrow couldn't come any sooner.

Armin, haven't taken of severe blow to the head, is not able to ride safely alone, and needs medical attention. I was astonished when Jean volunteered to have Armin ride with him, supposedly something happened between them. Please just let him be okay is all I can think.

"Ohoi! Eren! I'm talking to you!" Jean's words bring me back to reality.

"What?! We need to get back as soon as possible! Think about Armin! And how about Krista and Ymir? We need to get them all help right away!" I shout over the wind.

"You don't think I already know that?! I want to help Armin just as much as you do, and heck throw in the others too!"

"Then stop wasting time!" I can't do much anyways is all I can think.

" That's the problem," Jean shouts, " We have to head back to the wall."

Turning back towards him, I'm startled. Why would we have to go back to the wall if we have all the supplies and medicine at the castle to help heal the wounded? The castle was now in view, and the wall was another day on horseback. So why? We need to help Armin and the others injured now. I don't even think some of the others will make it that much longer. Soon. That's all I could think about the castle was right there. Still there's no way someone make it.

Before I could even say anything Marco speaks, "Eren! Please! Just pass along the message, this was not our idea, we were just told to tell the next person we came in contact with. That just happened to be you."

I didn't answer him, I didn't want to. Why? I still don't understand.

Marco speaks again, " We will stop at the castle first, the severely injured will stay there, but then we head strait to the wall."

Through all the ruckus in stampeding of hooves, Marco's voice seems to calm me.

"Okay, I'll pass it on," I say defiantly, " but I don't agree with it." This is all I say before turning back around and kicking my horse.

I move ahead leaving Jean and the others in my tracks. Up ahead about three miles or so Sasha turns around in her saddle in seem to see me. Well, I don't think I have food and I know she feels like shit but I have to pass along the message anyways. Kirsta and Ymir for her great friends India doesn't seem like they're going to make it. I'm sorry Sasha.

"Hey, Sasha! I'm sorry!" I force my horse faster while she slows down. Hopefully I can save some food later since I'm bothering her.

"Hey Eren, what's the need, " her voice is gloomy even though she has to yell to be heard.

" We have to go back to the wall, but head to the castle first, " it was simple enough. She had to deal with her own problems first. "Pads the message along when you see someone, " I gave her a pleasant smile and after that forced my horse ahead.

No questions asked, no statement said. That was how I liked it with something as simple as this. Plus Sasha had a lot to do with right now and I think she really needed this time to think like myself.

Finally, the castle was about another mile and a half from here. The looming towers gave off a foreboding sense, and in all, everything was a dark shade of cloud grey.

1 mile. I'm closer to Captain Levi now, maybe about 24 full paces ahead of me. He seem so confident riding now.

Three quarters of a mile. 16 more full cases till I'm near him. Now something seems to be bothering captain Levi. He's become rigid in the saddle. I have a feeling that he wants me next to him at this moment, but sadly I can't go any faster.

Half a mile. 11 full paces to Captain Levi. He would hear me if I called out to him, but not very well. Something feels wrong even to me at this moment. I must get up to Captain. The horses are slowing down and neighing relentlessly.

One quarter of a mile now. I am nearly there. Captain Levi rides about 7 full paces away. Faster, faster, faster! I must get to him.

BAM! Shots ring out from behind me. Scream, yells of pain, the shrieks of horses. Mine rears straight up before bolting towards the castle entrance. Others were not so lucky, there horse either took off in a different direction, or they fell off. Many were on the ground dead or bleeding. I didn't even have time to look at their faces as I bolted by on my steed.

BAM! More shots. They're coming from behind, I don't understand where. What's happening!? Red smoke emerges from the sky. All there is is red soaked into the ground and bleeding through the trees. The world around me seems to be collapsing before my very eyes.

Then, I see him. Captain Levi, flat on the ground with three bullet wounds in him. One buried deep in his thigh, another in the right side of his torso, in the last one right through the Recon Corp Wings of Freedom on his back. He was just laying there, his slate gray eyes staring out into nothingness. All I can do is watch. Comrades lying on the ground. No one can save us now. Yet I reach out, "Levi!" I scream! He must be hearing something!

"Captain Levi!" even more desperate now, "Please! Hear me! Levi!"

I jump off my horse and sprint to his side. "Stay here!" I practically scream. Tears are coming to my eyes. I have known him for so long! There were times when we would be laughing so hard that we nearly fell put of the trees we were in. We ate, together. We even cried together. He is my closest friend.

"Levi! Here me now! If you die what will happen to me!? Erwin!? Hangs!? Petra!? Or even Gunther?!" these were the only people that Levi truly cared about. Shots still, screams fill the air as if that was the only voice they had.

"Just stay, " my voice is barely a whisper by the time these words reach my lips. If I say anymore I don't think the tears will be able to be stopped.

He just stares up at me with those slate grey eyes, and with one blink he closes them, all is lost.

I sit there, my hands in his chest and torso trying to stop the bleeding. Soon, my Commanding Officer, Captain Levi, will bleed out and die. There is nothing I can do to save him.

End of The Beginning.

Okay, so please don't hurt me. There is more to this fic. K hope you somewhat enjoyed the first chapter and I'm sorry for killing dreams. I feel like this was a rushed chapter, but it seems okay. Please let me know what you think and any suggestions for what to write in this for the future! Sorry!! There will be more than one chapter, and until later, bye!!