Pregnant In the Quell

Chapter Thirty Four

Katniss' POV

Her name is Raine Primrose Mellark. Raine, representing the water that put out our flames. And her middle name Primrose. For my sister. She has dark
brown hair, with grey eyes to match. I can't help but see myself in her.

His name is Jay Zemel Mellark. Jay, representing the mockingjay and the impact it has had on me. And Zemel, named after Peeta's father, whom he lost. He has bright blue eyes with blonde hair. Every aspect of him is Peeta. I swear, he even acts like him.

Her name is Aster Madge Mellark. Aster, after a beautiful plant that grows in the meadow. Madge, after my only friend through my youth. She is a perfect mix of Peeta and I. She has Peeta's bright blue eyes with long brown hair. I can tell in her personality that she is a mixture of the two of us; she's always smiling, and oh, she's so strong. I see something very special in her. And what I see in her is Dahlia. She has the same spark in her glistening blue eyes, and that fire in her heart, just like her mom.

When I first found out that I had been pregnant with triplets. Fear consumed my whole body. Only the joy of holding all three them in my arms could tame it.

Ten years ago, I would have never thought I'd be here today, with a beautiful family. I had only known Peeta as the rich bakers kid, who I'd see occasionally near my home at the seam. Back then, I hadn't known he was in love with me. To be honest, I thought he was just there to mock my lifestyle. I had no father, only one true friend, a damaged mother, and a 10 year old to look after.

I wonder why such a terrible person would be blessed with three healthy children, and an amazing husband. So many people have died for me, including my own child.

I stare down at my son who is sleeping soundly. I play with the little tufts of blonde curls on his head.

I'd always wanted a son.  I had always though that if I would have children, they'd all be boys. I had never been the girly type. I always thought that if I had kids, they'd be with Gale, and they'd all be boys. I thought we'd  take them out hunting and be the tough type of family that showed no emotion towards each other. With so much fire, kindled with rage, I had expected nothing less.

Thinking about it now, I would hate having a life like that.

I look over at Peeta, who is sound asleep along with our two daughters. He's letting them listen to his heart beat. It seems to soothe them, which melts my heart, because the steady thud of Peeta's heart beat is something that always makes me feel better.

I can't wait to teach them how to hunt. I know they'll be great bakers like their father; especially little Jay. I want my children to have the childhood that was taken away from me.

I want to be there for them no matter what. Being only 24 and having to go through two hunger games, a rebellion, and even the death of your own child has definitely put a damper on my aspect of life.

But they give me a new reason to live.

My daze is broken by my son moving softly and letting out a small cry.

"Hey," I whisper. "Shh. You're okay."

He looks up at me, his eyes wide open and alert. He's only two days old and already impressing me.

"Did you have a nightmare?" I ask softly. "I get them too.. Someday I'll tell you why they come. And why they won't go away."

He covers his face with his arm and makes slight noises.

""I'll tell you how I survive it. I'll tell you that on bad mornings, it feels impossible to take pleasure in anything because I'm afraid it could be taken away. That's when I make a list in my head of every act of goodness I've seen someone do. It's like a game. Repetitive. Even a little tedious after all these years...

But there are much worse games to play."