Silence [ON HOLD]

We'll Fight Until The War's Won

I sat, sobbing. He doesn't get it does he? Until now, it felt like I don't have parents. And, they're always going away and stay way longer than needed. And you know what? They leave me here. Alone. I didn't even get allowance until school started! Basically, I'm going through the same thing he is! Except, I.... lost my sibling in the process.
~*~*~*

Despite my red eyes and snotty nose, I held my beanie in my hand. Carefully, I traced its stitches. My memories came flooding back as well; my past, my present. I saw shadows. Darkness. Death.

All of a sudden, I gasped for air, entranced by this pang of sadness. I flailed my arms trying to grasp anything I could, and to my surprise I caught hold of something. Quickly, I pulled it in and assessed it. To my surprise, it was an old friend.

I missed you, I started off in my head, but I promised to never use you for the same reason. But, I guess now is as good of a time as any.

I triggered the thing and warmth spread across my face; the feeling lost but all too familiar.

Fire engulfed my features and flames danced across a sea of darkness.

I knew that having friends wouldn't work out. The only person- erm thing that I could trust is you. What if I died today? Could I be with my other half again? No one would miss me anyways.

As if on cue, the flames grew brighter. I knew that it was just meant to happen. Just fate. Maybe I'd go the same way if I died the same. I neared the device to my blue sleeve.

Please, please forgive me for what I'm about to do.

'Knock knock'

As I heard the bang on my door, I turned the lighter off in an instant and dropped it on the floor. A few seconds after I got out of my room, I went back and checked it, you know? To, uh, not repeat old mistakes. I walked out again, seeing that everything was fine.

Wait.

I peeped back into the room to see it how I left it. Walking down the stairs, I chuckled. They say that maniacs only try the same thing over and over again and expect different results. To be fair, though, I am one. Before I opened the door, I looked in the mirror. With my bloodshot eyes, my wild hair, and my wild grin, I sure looked the part. The discovery caused me to chuckle again.

"Oh, hi Riles I see you've been..." the female's sentence trailed off, as if she was expecting me to finish it.

"Can I come in?" I shrugged at her and went over to the kitchen for a snack.

"So... After running out on us, Miles locked himself is his room. Ally said he's done things like that when his mom is brought up." Carmen grabbed a Coke and sat at one of the bar stools. Oh. Well, it's a sensitive topic, huh. I sat next to her after scooping out cookie dough ice cream. I shrugged. I care, I really do. It's just I show it in some weird ways.

"Riles, Miles didn't like that you brought up his mom, but there has to be a reason right?" Carmen furrowed her eyebrows. "Can you tell me?"

I played with my hands, showing that I was nervous and scared to tell her. I sighed, might as well, right? The only way I can find out I can trust her, is to trust her. Writing on a piece of paper, I told her about the last two dreams I've had. Dreams? Nightmares? Eh, what do you call them?