One Week Later:
Hazels Pov:
It's been a week since I've heard the news that I'm pregnant. I've had sleepless nights, daily anxiety and a feeling of being infuriated with myself because of my baffled mind. I couldn't think straight anymore. I've kept silent but I'm ready to explode with this unexpected surprise to someone. However, I can't because I'm still uncertain of what to do. Should I keep this baby or leave it? That has raced through my mind for countless days. This baby deserves a mother. A mother who rocks them to sleep, a mother who makes all of their nightmares disappear and a mother who would do anything to make the baby smile. I want to be that mother. Knowing I made someone happy would make my day. I may not have a significant other to help me though but I'll do this on my own. It's the only way I know. This poor little one wouldn't survive in an orphanage. I refuse to place them there, I couldn't live with myself. I sat on the living room chair thinking about all of this. The doctor said when I'm ready I'd tell him. I stared at the window, biting my nails impulsively. I told everyone that I just had a stomach virus. I felt guilty for lying but I had to keep this secret.
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"I have to tell someone, I cant take it." I whispered to myself. I starting sweating and feeling uncomfortable.
"Tell someone what?" Cyn asked. I turned my head and Cyn was standing there holding Julien. I looked at her hopeless and she sat on the sofa across from me. She had little Julien on her lap, he was playing with Cynthia's hands.
"Ignore him, he is just bored. Aren't you, sweetie?" Cyn said to Julien. He smiled at her and my heart throbbed because of his cuteness. I want that, I thought. "Is everything alright, Hazel?"
"Um..."I reluctantly said. "Can I tell you a secret?"
"Of course! You can tell me anything. John is gone with the boys so spill it." she said. I'd probably regret telling her this but its worth a try.
"Well, y-you know h-how I said I had a stomach virus last week." I stuttered. I pushed my hair behind my ears and rolled up my sleeves. I am so nervous to tell her, there is sweat dripping down my face.
"Urr... Yes, I was informed about that." she answered. She looked at my hands shaking. "Hazel, what's going on?"
"Cynthia, it wasn't a stomach virus." I candidly said. She put Julien down on the floor and she had a curious expression on her face. I wanted to be straight forward with her but words weren't forming out of my mouth. I took a deep breath. "I-I-I'm pre-pregnant."
She sat there speechless. Her eyes widened and she crossed her legs. She looked at the floor, I just stared at her. We sat in silence.
"Cyn, say something please! I don't know what to do. Its all too overwhelming." I bluntly burst out. She just sat there stunned just like myself when I heard the news. My friend wasn't talking to me. I kneeled down next to her, took her hands and started crying. "Cyn, please talk to me. What do I do?"
"Is Ross the father?" she finally said. I shook my head yes and cried louder. "Are you going to keep it?"
"I don't now, Cyn. That's why I told you. What do I do?" I cried. " I... I might want to keep it."
Cyn stood up and looked down at me. I sat on the floor with my knees up to my face.
"You aren't ready. I'm sorry, but you aren't capable to raise this baby. Especially since Ross is the father." she sternly said.
"I know that is the wise choice, but I can't do that to this baby. I can't send it to an orphanage or get an abortion." I whimpered.
"You aren't ready though, you are so young." she honestly said.
YOU ARE READING
If I Fell In Love With You
FanfictionHazel always suffered from anxiety and loneliness after her parents left her life. She grew up in an orphanage and escaped when she was sixteen. Now, five years later, she lives in a run-down apartment in Liverpool and she's a struggling artist tryi...