'Til I Found You - (A Nathan Sykes Love Story)

Chapter 16 - THAT Letter

‘Are you sure this is the place? It’s not as nice as mum described in the letter’ I sighed. ‘I was here this morning’ he replied. ‘Peaceful and magnificent? I don’t think so Nath’ I sighed. I headed on leaving him stationary on the roadway outside. ‘There is no life here Nathan. This place is dead’ I announced. ‘Freya, that is the whole point. It’s a graveyard’ he echoed. I pulled out the letter for reassurance. The words echoed around my head.

Dear Freya,

I know I’ve let you down, but I need you to know that I didn’t mean to hurt you. I acknowledge the fact that my excessive drinking has eradicated your life. Now, I need to make up for it. So this is not just a suicide letter to you, my dearest angel but also a letter of guidance. I need to enlighten you about your future, but more importantly, your past.

Perhaps I should start with the future. It’s the only thing that you can change. I want you to be happy my dear and I do believe that your eternal happiness lies in the hands of Nathan. I see a good boy in him; a good boy that will make you happy. . I know you have strong feeling for him, I could sense it in your body language. Don’t be afraid to express your emotions around him, but baby girl only say ‘I love you’ if you mean it. I can’t make you love Nathan, but maybe pushing you in the right direction is wise.

I want you to know, that everything I’ve ever done has been for you. I know I’ve kept a lot of secrets from you and made a lot of mistakes, but it’s made you stronger. I’ve saved up some money for you. It’s not a lot, but it’s enough to send you to college. I want you to have the house. It’s got a lot of memories, both good and bad. I don’t want you to forget them. They’ve made you who you are today.

Not knowing your dad is one thing that I know has tainted your life. Freya, I need you to know that, he was not a nice man. They say everything happens for a reason and maybe his departure was the best thing that ever happened in your life. Saying that, I do want you to know who he is, so this is the information that you’ve been waiting all your life to hear; his name is Pierre Lemay and he worked as a waiter in my local bar. He seduced me during a six month stay in the area and when he left, I thought I’d never see him again. I was pregnant and alone, but he turned up out of nowhere just before you were born. He couldn’t handle the pressure of fatherhood and left when you were a baby. After that, I never went looking for him again and I never heard anything from him until his death certificate came in the post. I’ll spare you the details of how he died, so for now all you need to know is that he’s buried in The Lovely Meadows Graveyard down by the old school. He was living down the road the whole time and we never realised. I want you to find him Freya. As much as I hated him, I’d prefer if you had a place where you could go and remember him and this is the place. I’ve been told it’s a peaceful and magnificent spot overlooking the Gloucestershire countryside. He would have loved it here.

Growing up, I never thought that I would have a daughter as special as you. I never wanted children in the first place, but you made being a mother worthwhile for me. I’ve never been so proud of you. I wish I could be there to see you marry the man of your dreams (I’m hoping that will be Nathan) or be there to see you welcome your first child into the world, but it’s best if I leave. I’m sure my lawyer will be in touch to organise your inheritance pretty shortly.

Baby girl, we’ll be watching you from above.

With love always,

Mummy xx

The tears trickled from my eyes like a baby waterfall as I finished reading her letter once more. It saddened me that she felt that suicide was the only escape for me from her drink problem. As I shoved the letter into my back pocket, the sky above opened up once again and covered us in its product. Nathan slipped his hand into mine and rubbed his thumb along the back of my hand. He hummed gently. ‘Cry your tears on my shoulder. You don’t know what the future holds, so I’ll be your personal soldier.’

Our shoes became over ridden with mud as we walked through the black slush. In a graveyard so popular like this one, you’d think they’d have some sort of a concrete path but they didn’t. Instead I had to get my new shoes dirty. ‘If you were a real gentleman then you’d carry me there’ I laughed. He smirked briefly before picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder. He almost ran through the vile mud with me in one hand and an umbrella in the other.

He slowed and then came to a half when we came to the grave. In comparison to some of the other graves, it was quite beautiful. The light grey colour of the stone stood out above the rest but the inscription was barely visible. The only thing I could read was his name. It sent me into a fit of chills. ‘Maybe we should head home before it gets dark’ he whispered. I nodded softly, but my eyes were glued to the flat stone. He held my hand in his and pulled me away. ‘We should go’ he mumbled but I still stood there. He moved so that now, he was acting as a wall between my dad and I.

He stood in front of me, the rain pelting off the umbrella he held above us. I guess the weather was just like my mood, dull, cold and downcast. It was possibly the worst day of my life; it was the day I found out my dad was dead and the day I buried my mother. 'I don't care if it rains for a century' he whispered, while drying my tears with the tissue in his hand. 'Why?' I croaked. 'Because I'll be here with you' he whispered before kissing me. Our lips moved in sync, as the kiss grew more passionate. It felt so right, like it was meant to be. ‘We’ve missed your mum’s funeral’ he whispered as we tore apart. ‘We were there in spirit’ I replied. ‘Mollie is going to be so mad’ he laughed. ‘I don’t care’ I shrugged. ‘You, me and Simba’ he whispered before talking my hand. ‘It’s a date!’ I replied.

 As we walked through the old unkept graveyard late that evening, everything seemed right. I had just lost my mum and dad, but that didn’t seem to faze me. It was a strange feeling that was bound to change once everything had sunk it. Maybe it was because I had finally been given the chance to be happy with the only person I’ve ever loved; Nathan James Sykes. It felt good to be able to say that I was his girlfriend. Over time he had made some romantic mistakes, but maybe he was beginning to erase them with me. I do hope so. They say you don’t know how it feels to win without losing first ad it is true. If my mum was here she’d say, ‘time is like a river. You cannot touch the same water twice, because the flow that has passed will never pass again. Enjoy every moment of life. Accept every second. Acknowledge every failure. Beckon at every opportunity. Grant every wish. Live life to the fullest. Love life with every breath.’

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And there we go! 'Til I Found You is complete!  This was my favourite story to write! I hope you all liked it and I would like to officially announce that there WILL be a sequel coming very soon! King of Hearts will feature Nathan and Freya as the centre couples continuing on from 'Til I Found You! 

Thank you all so so much for reading, I hope you all enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! 

Comment :)

Vote :)

Fan :)

Rachael xx