I PUT THIS UP SO SOON YOU GUYS ARE ALL FABULOUS ;) this is my dog she loves you
Edited
--------I didn't expect Vic's brother to turn up, in all honesty, I expected Mike to be smaller. He seemed okay, though the bruises on his face said otherwise. Sighing, I stood up, dismissing both Jaime's and Tony's attempt to persuade me to stay. My room was the only place I felt like going, I felt really alone, even Vic had a guest.
I curled up on my bed. I missed the times when I had people to rely on, when my mom was kind, when I had friends. Why did I have to like guys? The moment I came out of the closet I lost it all. Why do people discriminate against me because i like boys? How is that fair? Now I feel more trapped than ever. I couldn't go for late night walks or get a coffee in the mornings after sleepless nights. I had no control. That's one of the reasons I cut myself, to feel in control of my body, like I can do something that my body doesn't like, and there's nothing it can do. Maybe that's why Vic doesn't eat.
Vic. That beautiful, brown haired boy. He's making my stay at this shit hole worthwhile. He cares. No one has ever cared before, not for a long time. Having him care for me makes me feel good. For years I've felt worthless. I've been hiding from my problems ever since I was little, hiding from my dad while he hit my mom. I could've done something to change that but I was to petty, to weak to help her. I should've done something, but now it's too late.
A knock rapped at my door, making me groan and stand up. I wanted to be alone. It wasn't Vic, Mike was here, no doubt he'd be spending time with his brother, plus, he usually walks in without knocking.
I opened the door, ready to push away whoever stood behind it. I expected Tony or Jaime, my new friends, but I was particularly shocked at the figure behind it.
"Mom?"
"Kellin," my mother stood, glossy eyed at the door.
Before I could even speak, she pulled me into a hug.
"What are you doing here?"
"I'm here to see you, Kel," she spoke, "I missed you."
I honestly don't understand how I'm supposed to feel right now. After years of ignorance and even abuse, she's started treating me okay. Should I be mad? Our talk before I left for here adds more confusion. When it happened I thought she was drunk, she left me after having a heartfelt conversation.
"I get it," she said, "you can be mad at me, I've been nothing but shit to you for years, you're allowed to be angry at me."
"I'm not angry," I announced, "I'm just confused."
"You should be mad, why are you confused?"
"Why now? Was it really my own suffering that got you to care?"
"I was blind, I didn't know how much you were worth until you were lying in the hospital bed, hurt, because of him, and I didn't stop it," she told me, "I want you to be mad at me."
" I think I'm slightly mad at you," I said, "but I guess I just want my mom back."
"Well maybe we should start rebuilding this relationship by you showing me around," she smiled.
I grinned and told her to follow me, leading her out of the room.
"Are there any lucky boys, then?" she giggled.
I blushed furiously, shaking my head.
"Tell me who he is," she raised one eyebrow, knowingly.
"His names Vic," my heart fluttered at his name, "he's my roommate."
I pulled her into the common room, which had a couple of families on the sofas, talking and smiling happily.
"This is the common room, although I don't particularly like this place, it's always overcrowded."
"You're claustrophobic," she nodded.
"How did you know?" I'd never told her that I was claustrophobic.
"You're my son," she frowned, "of course I know."
I began leading her to my favourite room, they called it the lounge room, no one ever went in it because it only had books, the common room had a TV and board games and some other cool things. I liked the lounge room because it was more private.
Mike and Vic sat on the sofa, speaking to each other.
"Hey Kellin," Vic smiled chirpily, I hadn't seen him happy like this before.
"Hey Vic!"
"So this is Vic," my mother smirked, "Kellin was telling me how you were his roommate."
"Yeah, this is my brother, Mike," he introduced Mike to us.
"I'm Kellin's mom, Karon."
"How about we take this gathering to the snack bar?" Mike suggested, Vic nodded hesitantly, my mother agreed and I didn't want to be the only one not going, so I followed behind my mother and Mike, while Vic stood at my side.
YOU ARE READING
Suicide ↠ Kellic
Fanfiction"I used to hate my life, hate myself, hate everything around me until I met this one boy who changed my life." |completed July 10th 2016|