HIS-Story

HIS-Story~9

Embarrassment....

That's what I'm feeling. Not because I read that stupid writing in my journal, but because I let the past and present get to me. Everything I read was true, that's why they called me legendary because I was the youngest nigga on the block that held a gun and pulled the trigger without second thoughts.
John was supposed to kill that man, but I did. He was there with me with his gun in his hand, but I had the balls to pull the trigger as he ran.
You can call me crazy or not; I don't care. I had to do what I had to do to survive and support my sister and mother. Yes, for the past eleven years I felt horrible about it. I even had PTS for the first five years, but I got over it.

I suddenly heard a tap on the window and a low muffle. "AJ open up." Amber said while hugging her arms as she shivered from the cold and sudden breeze.

I unlocked the passenger side door to allow her in. "I'm sorry." That was the first thing she said when she sat on the truck. "I'm sorry for taking your book and pressuring you to go up there."

I didn't say anything, instead I turned the nob under the radio so heat can blow.

"Here." She reached into her purse and took out my personal journal that I am certainly going to burn after this. From sitting in the truck for over a hour, I realized keeping the negative past was not healthy nor helpful.

The journal held all my old fears. Fears I do not want to face again. I grab the book and threw it in the back seat. "I'm going to take you home. I'm just tired." I hope I didn't hurt her feelings. I know this phrase is stupid; but it's not her, it's me.

~~~~~~~~~~<

I looked up at the white ceiling in my room daydreaming about mom; when she was alive. But like all good things, it came to a end when there was a light knock on my opened door. I tilted my head to the side to see Amber standing in my doorway with a worried look on her face.

I quickly sit up in my bed and gave her a small smile. "Hey."

"Hi." She returned the small smile and slowly stepped into my room. "Are you okay?" She asked as she stood in the middle of my room awkwardly; like she doesn't know what to do with herself.

"You can sit next to me." I swing my legs off the bed so my feet can touch the polished wooden floor. Amber stared at me as she ease her big plump ass on my bed. We was so close, her thighs brushed against mine and I can smell her perfume or soap, maybe it's her natural scent. Amber opened her mouth to say something, but I beat her to it. "Don't say sorry."

"How did you know I was going to say that?"

"Because...I just know." I chuckled to myself then shrugged. "Don't ever say sorry to anyone, not even me. Most individuals do not deserve a sorry from a nice person like yourself."

She smiled. Finally, it's been over eight hours since I seen that smile of hers. I took that opportunity to kiss her plump lips. I heard and felt the vibrations from her mouth that passed out a moan.

I would of did some more, but I heard low whispers in the background and crunching. I looked up to Shawn and April watching us through the doorway while eating Doritos. I groaned and broke the kiss.

"Don't stop for us. Keep going." April joked.

"Show some skin too." Shawn added before putting a full dorito in his mouth. "You all can continue."

I rolled my eyes. "See that's why I keep my door closed, because of theses perverted niggas."

"We going out for lunch. Y'all want to come or suck on each other faces-

"Or just fuck." Shawn said bluntly; interrupting April in the middle of her PG rated sentence. Amber eyes widened from his comment.

"Nigga, seriously." April swatted his arm. "We're going to leave y'all alone." April; like the savior she is pulled Shawn away from my door and closed it as well.

"So do you want to go to lunch?" I asked; looking at the beautiful woman beside me.

Soon her smile turned into a smirk. "I actually want to stay here, with you laying down on your back as..." She soon paused.

"As?"

Her smirk deepened. "As I take advantage with you."

"Advantage? Of me?"

Amber nod and pushed me back on my mattress before straddling my waist. "Yes." She pecked my lips before grinding on me.

Damn! I was already hard.

"You like control, don't you?" I asked.

Amber shrugged. "Women has to have a form of submission to their man outside the bedroom, why not get some control inside the bedroom." She stopped grinding her hips and looked down at me with concern. "Is that okay with you?"

I nod. "Hell yeah. I like my woman with a little control." With that, I flipped her on her back. "But I do see myself as the alpha male, so it may have some complications." I started to kiss down her neck as my hands lifted up her shirt to show her stomach. It's not flat, nor hanging out, her stomach was perfect. Her whole body is perfect.

"AJ." My name came out of Amber's sexy lips.

"Yes?" I said against her soft skin that was hot against my lips.

"I'm sorry, for everything I've done last night. I thought I was doing something right. I didn't actually know it'll affect you emotionally."

I lifted my head to look at her beautiful face. "You don't have to apologize-"

"I know. But if I didn't it'll haunt me until I do. Is that the reason why they call you legendary? Because you killed a man."

Now I'm not hard anymore. "Yes. I was the youngest nigga on the block that pulled the trigger. I was the one that had the balls to face my fear of going to jail at the age of fifteen."

"Was you doing it for your family?" She sat up in front of me. "Did you do it to impress anyone?"

My scrunched up. Impress? That word is not even in my dictionary. "I don't do anything that involves holding a gun to impress any of my friends, nor random niggas on the street. I did it to make sure my baby sister won't starve and my mother not to work herself to death." I stated.

Amber nod, then placed her hand on my chest that was covered by my tank top. To her I was probably angry, but I was actually calm. With a deep sigh, I put my hands on top of hers.

"How about we go out to lunch? The two of us." Amber suggested.

I shook my head. "Nah, I'm not hungry. Let's just chill."

"Chill or chill?"

I chuckled. "Chill as in watch a movie, order Chinese. Get your mind out the gutter." I tape her forehead, making her laugh.

That laugh is so addicting. Having her around is going to be... How should I put this....Awesome? Great? Fun? Beneficial? Shit I don't know..