One Direction Imagines

Finally (Harry Styles)

The soft summer breeze wisps past my body crouched over a battered copy of one of my old favourites flickering the pages gently whilst blowing a forgotten piece of hair tucked from behind my ear into my line of sight. I consciously close my eyes, trying to heighten my sense of hearing, aiming to take in the moment of complete serenity and bliss, as I know it’s not healthy for me to come here often, sometimes, however I find myself wandering eventually sniggering to myself as my feet subconsciously bring me here. I hear the lowly trickle of the stream where we once had a small water fight, the squawking of varied species of birds, nestling in the oak tree upon the hill where we once sat under to cover from specks of rain, the bristle of grass and small flowers underneath me, where we used to lay and effortlessly tell each other secrets of love and passion. My eyes snap open as I realise I let my mind slip too far, thinking of him whilst careful not to say his name and the slow whispers of endearment is something I almost never do, just to try and inch back the sanity I lost when it ended, but I’m only human, so now and again I creep into that darken and hidden corner of my mind to bask into the simple task of letting go and divulging into memories, that I long to forget but habitually try to remember.

That’s when I hear the soft echo of a girlish giggle come to life, realising how long it had been since I had laughed like that understanding if I did, it may sound similar. I tenderly drag myself up from my perched state and stand, not just to stretch my now stiff limbs, but also to familiarise myself as to where and from whom the new noise evading my senses is coming from.

The moment I see them, the pain I thought would come doesn’t, the surprise I thought I would feel doesn’t linger and the jealously I so desperately used to try to escape, thankfully doesn’t make an appearance. Instead, relief washes over me like a cold shower on a hot summers day or a warm beverage on a cold winters night, appreciation of them and proudness seep through like a parent seeing their child win something. Desperation does not fill me because he is seated upon the perch where he first kissed me with supple lips, instead adoration shines through. He has changed in the months since I saw him last, no longer a fragment of his former self… No, now he looks like he did when I first met him, youthful spread with essence and spirit. Still just as beautiful as the day I first got the honour to glance upon his perfectly sculpted face, but the biggest and greatest change is that there is no longer a permanent frown etched upon his face. Now, his breath taking smile is on full view and I have a sudden gratification for the girl who has quite honestly brought him back to life, a gratification for him and her, them.

I walk forward not bothering to worry about my book left behind or the interaction I may interrupt before me, as I reach them and stand before them, neither peer up at me, not that I expect them to, nobody does anymore. The slight summer breeze flows through the air once again, and he looks up into the empty space before him that I fill, as if he remembers something or someone… A sad smile comes to show upon his face and he stares deeply at me, making me feel as though no one ever has.

“Hey you, it’s been a while.” I sing as I finally look upon the boy I had the pleasure to once call my own. As if, he can hear me his face slowly forms into one of blissful happiness like he finally realises he can let the weight he has been carrying around upon his shoulders go.

And just like him, I also find myself at peace finally as I no longer have to look upon him to make sure he will get by without me, now I know he can.

I silently wake into an unforeseeable path of picnics under the great oak tree, whispered readings of books whilst propped upon his lap, and subtle kisses upon the grass in the meadow that we once called our spot. Although in this meadow there is no ending for us, no grief or longing and nobody else. I do not have to feel guilty at taking in the full pleasure of being here, or worry I may lose myself. As it is just us in the same spot where he first told me he would love me until the end of my existence, which abruptly came too soon. This meadow is not ours it is mine, my own personal heaven.

CREDITS: twitter.com/watermelooonnnn