Shadows Of My Heart

Nature's Healing Call

You see the wind flow through the trees,

Drifting the sense of peace and safety,

Closer and closer to your fragile self,

Giving you the strength to fight,

And to stay alive,

You know within yourself that you are strong,

And that you are not alone,

That you are not the only depressed girl,

That has resorted to violence upon themselves,

As a sense of release,

The thrill from the blade as it cuts your flesh,

Can be the best thing you feel in your entire life,

People tell you that it is wrong and it is dangerous,

But you just think that they are jealous of your way of coping.

You ignore all your friends’ words of advice,

And continue to cut, getting deeper and deeper,

And closer to your main veins every time,

You realized the closer to the vein the more blood that spills,

You sit and watch your blood drip down to the floor,

As your sight starts to go black from blood loss,

You lay on the ground as vertigo hits,

As your body starts to shut down,

You wake up in the cold dark night,

Surrounded by a puddle of blood,

You pick yourself up off the cold ground,

And look around the room,

You realize that after all the hours that you have been in the room,

No one has wondered where you were,

No one has cared that you were missing,

You pick yourself up and clean yourself off,

And just walk out of the room with your head held high,

Walk to the old oak tree behind your house,

And climb to the tallest branch,

And sit there and pray for forgiveness,

For all the sins that you have committed,

You sit up in that tree for hours on end,

Just enjoying the peace and quiet,

The feeling of the wind in your hair,

And the sound of the air dancing through the leaves,

As it gets dark you carefully climb down,

And walk back inside the house,

And ignores the looks you get from your family,

As you trudge up the stairs to your room,

And fall asleep,

You wake up knowing that you are not alone,

That you will survive,

You throw away all your blades,

And tell your family that you need help,

They call in the specialists,

They give you pills to make you feel better and they work,

You talk to other girls that feel like you do and you all help each other,

You slowly start to recover and heal,

And your relationship with your family starts to build,

Whenever you feel lonely or depressed,

You go and sit on that branch at the top of the old oak tree,

And just sit and listen to natures calming sounds,

They make you feel at peace with yourself and happy within,

As long as you are happy you will survive.