Feels like you don't got me
so you feel like you've been by yourself
Camila
I dont think I really understand actually how bad I hurt Lani. I was her world, she was mine. Why did I let that go?
"Hi baby." Dinah wrapped her arms around my shoulders.
Oh, that is why.
"Hey." I looked up at her and smiled.
"What did you do today?" She asked, sitting in front of me, picking up a Teen Vogue magazine.
I shrugged, "nothing much really." She has no idea that I met with Lani earlier today and I'm not gonna tell her about it.
"Sounds boring."
Just like this convo I said to myself. But to her, I just smiled. "Yeah."
For some reason I wanted to text her again. The feeling on contacting her after all these years makes me really happy.
I sighed quietly and looked up at Dinah, who was scanning through the magazine. How could you not love Dinah? She's absolutely perfect. She's like a goddess or Beyoncé. I smiled while staring at her.
"Stop staring you dork." She glanced over at me, with a smile on her lips.
I hopped over the table and leaned in closer, touching our lips, mumbling, "never."
I'm happy, right?
-
Dinah left a few minutes ago to go pick up dinner for us. You wanna guess who's still on my mind? If you guessed Kehlani then, ding ding ding! You are correct!
I furrowed my eyebrows, thinking about the videos I just to have of her. I quickly ran upstairs into my room and darted into my closet. In one of these shoes boxes, there were several pictures and videos of Lani and I that I can never throw away. Dinah doesn't know I have these, she's go crazy and probably throw them out herself. I smiled when I found the box, quickly opening the lid.
So many pictures. I pulled out one of her at the beach. She was smiling widely. I smiled at the sight of her smiling.
I pulled out another one of her standing in front of a food truck. I laughed when I remember how she begged me to take a picture of her.
Those tattoos... God, those tattoos were always a turn on. Damn, and they still looked good.
"I'm home!" I heard a voice ring throughout the house. I quickly placed the lid back on the box and stuffed the box back into my closet. I ran down the stairs to greet Dinah. "Hey."
"I hope you're in the mood for Greek." Dinah wiggled her eyebrows, holding up what I assumed was Greek food.
I tilted my head sideways, giving her a amused look. "I've never had Greek before."
"Me neither," Dinah shrugged. "But I liked the name."
I gasped, "Dinah!" I laughed.
Being with Dinah all these years have been fun, but I think we lost the excitement we had when we first started going out. Maybe I was in love with the idea of being with Dinah because I was with someone else. Fucked up, I know. I thought back to the moment I first cheated on Lani with Dinah. I never meant for it to continue on, basically making it an affair.
"Dinah!" I giggled and pushed her hands away. "Stop tickling me!"
"And if i don't?" A smirked played on her plump lips.
I bit my own lip. "Uh... Don't know."
She laughed and climbed on top of me and started ticking me again. I shouted out numerous stops, and let me go.
"Fine, fine." She gave in, but stayed on top of me.
We had a staring contest after that. I have no idea what's going on. I saw Dinah starting to lean down- my eyes quickly widening.
"I have to go. Lani's waiting for me." I said rather quickly.
"No, stay." Dinah said in a rather hushed voice. Her lips slowly inched closer to mine. Soon enough, our lips touched.
The taste of Dinah's lips was a lot different than Kehlani's. Hers tasted of pineapple. I brought my hand behind her neck, deepening the kiss.
I should be stopping this. I have a loving girlfriend at home. I love Lani. We've been together for almost 2 years ago.
"Dinah." I said into the kiss, slightly pulling away.
"No, shh." She grabbed my face, reconnecting our lips. Her tongue slipping through my lips.
That day I went home feeling so guilty. While Kehlani thought I was perfect but behind the scenes, I was screwing my best friend. After that night, I found myself drawn to Dinah even more. I would make up excuses to go see Dinah almost every day. I would tell her I'm at work late, or I'm with the girls, sometimes I told the truth and say I was with Dinah. Many times, I would stay out all night with Dinah. I would ignore Lani and text her back in the morning.
It went on for about a good 3 months before Kehalni went off.
I don't know exactly how she found out that one day, but I always had a hunch she knew. I remembered her throwing down all my stuff I had in the house. I've never seen her so mad before. Once again, I caused that. I owe it to Lani. I have so much to make up for being a shitty girlfriend. I know she hates my guts and I honestly don't blame her.
I have so many wrongs and I just want to make it right with her.
