The Remarkable Romez

Chapter Five: All About Gilda

Gilda Geld is--to me--a scary story. Sometimes, when I start to think about her, it's almost like all of my good thoughts sneakily fly away, and it plants shivers down my spine. See? I can't even comprehend to think about her. Well anyway, to other people, she's the queen bee type. Gilda is always fake kind to everyone. Showering people with sincere-seeming compliments, baking people cookies "just because", and  giving hugs and blowing kisses filled with 'OMG I LOVE YOUUUUU''s. By doing this, you might think people would just deflect everything she attempted because it's really weird, like giving her an insult back to her compliment (ooh, I'd like to see this), stuffing one of the cookies she'd baked in her mouth and saying "SHUT UP!"  (that too!), or push her away when she's hugging and say "OMG I HATE YOUUUUU!" back (I really wanna see this!). But anyway, that's just the opposite. If Gilda acts like this, then they'll return the favor, by giving her anything she wants.

Example, in high school, the nerdy Goopy GilsCarbo rigged the votes for prom queen after Gilda came and seduced him. She became prom queen, but sadly, Goopy did not become her king or even her boyfriend. I know this only because he was staggering around the hallways one day after the prom, after he'd been ditched by the prom queen, with the smell of liquor on his breath. He was going from person to person asking drunkenly if anyone had seen his "baby", Gilda. He came to me and asked the same question, but instead of telling him 'No,' like everyone else, I asked him what had happened. Without a warning, he freaking poured his heart out like a fountain, and started to bawl like a baby. He wrapped his arms around me profoundly, crying on my shoulder, while I stood there like sink drain, letting his tears soak into my blouse. He let my grasp go and sniffled before he found another victim. Right there I saw the principal and the vice principal walk up and lecture him, and send him away, expelled. I don't think he went to any other school after that, he just dropped out. And to think: Gilda caused all of that. 

Even though I'd know Gilda for a couple of years, my rivalry with her started the summer after my little performance--which, by the way, really made no difference to the finances at our house. See, in the seventh grade, I was a little... how do I explain...  Geekish? Holy crap, no... wow, I mean yes. Yes, I was geekish. I can't believe it, that I, the Remarkable Romez, was a geek. I guess that's why I'm so intelligent. I was a math and band geek. (I played in the percussion section, the section where you can go if you're incapable of playing a wind instrument, but you still want to be in band)

Anyway, in seventh grade, I hadn't one friend but my best friend, Billy Specter. Yes, my best friend was a boy, but there isn't a problem with that. Not at all. Oh, well, except for one thing: I had a major crush on Billy. I still do, actually. And I'm not sure if he noticed, or if he liked me back, but I knew that neither of those things were tolerated since I knew how badly it would affect our friendship. In that case, I decided just to stay friends, unless if he serenaded me outside of my bedroom window or something. Unfortunately, I kept my expectations low because I doubted he'd do something like that, romantic and lovely, because guys didn't do that kind of stuff anymore--and because I didn't even know if Billy had a romantic side.  

On the first day, we both vowed to stay by each other's side. Billy and I both were geeks, so we didn't want to attract any attention. We walked down the hall to our first class, which we luckily both had together.  Since we were so early, no one was there, and we sat down next to each other and talked about whatever we were talking about. When we talked, he always paid all of his attention to me, his bright blue eyes sparkling, like he was hanging on my every word. He made me feel loved. But then, all hell broke loose. The blonde, pink worshiping she-devil, Gilda, struted to the two seats in front of us, brushed a seat off and elegantly sat down. Yeah, like she's elegant. Her two minions, Shelia and Farah, sat down on the sides of her. Gilda whipped around all of a sudden like a Jack-In-The-Box.