Twenty-seven

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Renesme

I let my smile fall when Dad looked back at mom. They loved each other so much. We could be happy. Just the three of us. I knew it was possible.

I knew she wasn't dead though. I could feel her. She wouldn't let me in, but I knew that she was there somewhere in the world, wandering alone. She'd been building a wall between us. But there were cracks in the bricks. Peek holes that I could see through.

I didn't tell them. How could I? She had hurt us enough already. She was dead to them. Again. And maybe that's how it should be. She was right when she said that all she could ever give us was pain. Amber never said it out loud. But I could feel it in her heart.

Right now she was in front of a mirror. Almost like we're staring right at each other. She's pretending I'm not real. Ignoring my accusations and pleads.

Jacob squeezed my hand, bringing me back to my world. I looked up at him. I knew he knew. Not specifically that Amber was alive. Just that I was not okay.

I smiled at him to show him that I was okay. He didn't buy it. But he didn't say anything either. He would ask me about it when we're alone. I don't know what I will tell him. I didn't want to cause anymore grief, so I doubt I will tell him the truth.

But just because I didn't have anyones help didn't mean I wouldn't get to Amber on my own. I will save her. Someday.

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