A Selfish Kind Of Love

Confidence

~Michael's POV

Once I got out the hospital we continued the tour with Leon, making sure I took care of myself. I was counting down the days until the last show. Physically my body was exhausted, no matter how much rest I had. I loved performing, but it's been almost two years. I need a break.

Meanwhile, Rayne kept me updated on the wedding plans and how my sisters were driving her insane. I hope she doesn't let them control everything.

That's another reason I'm waiting for the tour to end, I'm ready to marry Rayne. My mind is constantly on her, I felt terrible leaving her to plan the entire thing by herself, but knowing I'll be home in a few weeks is making me feel a little better.

To keep myself busy, I've been writing music to put on a new album, whenever I start recording.

"The Grammy's are asking for a performance from you this year.." Frank says, walking in my room.

"Ok.." I say, shrugging. "Is it possible?" I ask.

"Well yeah. I just wanted to ask you before I said yes, usually you get on my case about that." Frank responds.

"Since I'm nominated for three awards, I can do it." I chuckle. I scribbled my pencil on my sheet of paper, completely focused.

"Something about you. The stare in your eyes.
Everything I'm looking for, I seem to find.
All this time away.. Is killing me inside.
I need your love in my life" I mutter.

Frank rolls his eyes, "are you gonna keep writing love songs the whole tour Mike? We get it, you're in love."

I chuckle, "Frank if you don't like it, why don't you wait outside with Bill? I'm getting married, of course I'm in love. Soon I'll be having kids and making my own family. I'm excited."

Frank sits next to me, a small sigh releasing from his lips. "Mike, let me give you some advice." He says wrapping an arm around my shoulder. "Marriage is a beautiful thing, there's no feeling describable than knowing you're about to be with the one person you couldn't imagine being without. But marriage also shows people who you really are. How do you know Rayne wants kids? It's a pain in the butt to be with the same person 24 hours a day. She's going to irritate you. And kids? Don't rush! I've got two sons, it's not easy-"

"Frank Frank Frank... Thank you, but I don't need the speech. I know what I'm doing, I know what I want." I smile, removing his arm. "You told me, I need someone who will love me, not for my name, but because of my personality and who I am as a person. Rayne has been that way since I met her. I mean, I had to almost beat her door down to see her again after we first met! She and I have something real. I'm marrying her."

"I just think you're still too young to be getting married.. You're in your prime. So many women are flocking to you.." He crosses his arms.

"Women have been 'flocking' to me since I was 17, I'm almost 30. I think I'm at the perfect age." I chuckle. "Now, I have to get dressed for this interview, I'll be down soon." I say heading for the bathroom. Frank waves himself out as he grumbles unknown words.

I remove my shirt, running my fingers across the pale patches of my skin. I run across my side to another patch trailing from my hip to my underarm. I heave a heavy sigh, hating my appearance more and more. How Rayne tends to look past the monster I see before me, is beyond me. But I couldn't help but love her for simply loving me, and that's all I could ever ask for.

Why didn't Frank understand that? What kind of person does he think she is? He wouldn't understand because his social status isn't like mine at all. He's not being judged every time he does something. My room phone interrupts my thoughts as I rush out the bathroom to get it.