Colors

Eighteen

A/N: I haven't edited this yet... Sorry

"Scott, you can't." I barely heard the words over the strong pounding in my ears. The slow beat of the blood pumping in my head harmonised with the thoughts that rushed through my head, outlining the worst possibilities that could happen next, how everything was going to change, lists of all the things I needed to do before I would say goodbye forever.

"I don't have another choice." I managed to grasp the correct words, looking at Kirstie first and then to Alex. My eyes finally landed on Troye, who was sat still, his eyes wide and focused on me. "When you said you wanted to come, were you ready to leave today?" I asked softly and immediately regretted it. I couldn't ask him to come with me, it was too dangerous. I couldn't have that possible blood on my hands.

"I've been ready for months. I have a bag packed and everything." He said softly and leaned across to place a hand on my shoulder. "This is my choice, Scott." He said softly, looking me straight in the eye as if he could tell that I was doubting whether to let him come.

I stood up, maybe a little too fast as my eyes blurred over for a second and I became immensely dizzy. It took a second, but I corrected myself again and turned to get a good view in case there was anyone else in the park.

"I need three things. To say goodbye to my family, to pack clothes and enough food to last us however long we need, and to find an escape route because just walking to the border isn't going to be good enough." I pushed my hair back for the tenth time in the space of three minutes, my hands shaking from nerves as well as the adrenaline that was starting to kick in the more what we were about to do sunk in.

"Okay, what first?" Alex was the next to stand up, wiping his palms on his jeans.

"Wh-what?" All I could do was stare at him, trying to process what he meant even though there was really nothing logical going through my head.

"You didn't think we were going to let you go off and have your adventures without us, did you?" Alex and Kirstie shared a look and both she and Troye stood up. I almost laughed at how cliche the moment was, the line something that I had heard millions of times in teen apocalypse films. 

"I think it's best if we all split up, it'll be the only way for us to all get this done before dark. Each of us need to pack our bags and say our goodbyes. I'll take my parents old car and pick everyone up before stopping at yours, Scott. We've been waiting for you to decide that it's time to leave for weeks." Wait, so I was the only one who hadn't actually planned on leaving? Hm, I guess that's a little ironic. Before I could let out the bitter laugh starting in my chest which was probably accompanied by tears, Kirstie wrapped her arms around my waist and pulled me into a hug. My mind stopped and I smiled, the feeling was so genuine that I held her close, just slowing my breathing to enjoy the moment before the small girl pulled back. "Let's do this." She grinned.

I still wasn't sure about all of this, I couldn't possibly allow them to ruin their lives because of my own. But I agreed and went back to my house, thankful that I could keep my head down and pull up my hoodie. I think I got a few strange looks, however most people just passed it off as being strange falling shadow.

I got home and went through the front door, hearing my parents in the sitting room talking about something that I couldn't make out through the wall, mixed with sounds of the television, the dishwasher, and Lauren playing music in her room. This was it. This feeling was my family, the people who raised me and made me into who I was. And I was saying goodbye to them.