Alexis (Jalex ~ Transgender AU)

Epilogue.

≪Jack's p.o.v≫

Alexis Gaskarth died at 4:26 pm on June the 20th.

No one had truly been the same since she passed. It was just such a shock to us all, we didn't expect such a thing to happen.

I remember when her mom came to the hospital, she broke down crying, falling to the floor, screaming and crying about how her baby was gone. She was so broken. She had lost her only child whom she loved dearly. She blamed herself, which was sad. She said that if she didn't agree to work late that night, Alexis would still be alive.

I remember that I was the one to break the news to Tay. She started shaking and crying on the spot. I pulled her into a hug and let her cry in my shoulder, whilst I cried on hers. She lost her only friend, so I let her know that I'd always look out for her now on.

I remember telling my parents. I could barely speak, I cried so much. I didn't expect them to care, so when I felt my mother's warm embrace, I was overwhelmed with emotion. My mom said that she was sorry that her and my dad made me split with her, she felt awful. My dad was the same. The last time my father hugged me was when I was seven, but he was quick to comfort me when he heard the devastating news. 

I remember when the school had to announce it in an assembly. Mr Way spoke about how much a lovely person she was and how she didn't deserve to be treated the way she was. They got me to speak about her. I got on the stage and talked about how much I adored and loved her. I remember sobbing during it. Mr Fuentes had to guide me off stage and take me outside to calm down. Everyone was silent that day.

I remember her funeral. It was a rainy Sunday at noon, typical really. Everyone was dressed in black. They would go up to Alexis' mom and console her. The service was sad, yet beautiful. I had a to preform speech, her mom said it was beautiful and moving afterwards. Her father was at the funeral. I didn't know it was him at first, but her mom pointed him out of the crowd. I remember seeing him crying in the corner. He must of felt guilty, like all of us.

I remember saying my last goodbye. The funeral home had done her makeup and put her into a velvet, white dress, as her mom requested. She looked so peaceful.

I remember going to therapy. After her funeral I had become severely depressed. My therapist was called Jeff, Jeff Maker to be exact. He was a nice man, he did help me. He tried to make me take antidepressants, I refused, obviously. I had learnt that, that was how she killed herself, no way was I taking them. They reminded me too much of her.

I remember how I still visited her grave on the anniversary of her death after six years. I always brought her at least two bouquets, which only contained the most beautiful flowers. I still loved her a lot; I couldn't let her go.

I remember going on my first date in seven years. My mom said that I had to put myself out there again. She said I had to let Alexis go. I remember meeting up with this girl from the Internet called Chrissy. She was nice and all, but I just couldn't, I couldn't possibly date her. I guess I couldn't let Alexis go after all...

And that brings me to where I am now, standing on top of a bridge, watching the waves crash beneath me. It was 4am. No one was here. No one could stop me. I left a note in my small apartment, explaining my fatal decision. For the past eight years I've been so depressed, so, so depressed. I told everyone around me that I was happy, they all seemed to believe me, so this'll be a shock to most. I really couldn't let my princess go. Everything was okay with her. I wanted to be with her again. I was never religious neither was I spiritual, however I felt like if I did this I'd be with her again. I'd be happy and content for the first time in years. I wanted her. I needed her.

I remember when I jumped.

I remember letting the water indulge me.

I remember finally being at peace.

～～～～～～

It's over! I just have to say, thank you so, so, so much for reading my story. I still get overwhelmed whenever I see that someone has commented or voted. I love you all and thank you so much for being here.