Love from Mars Vol.1

Raging Rant

I could curse everyone out right now but where would that get me?
Nowhere, exactly.
I seat here and feel myself burning up in anger. No, not anger. Rage.
Rage that I have been holding on for too long. Rage that brings out a side of me that I never show people because it's malevolent, it's maleficent, it's pure evil.
Rage that can only make my mood swings from chill to aggressive and extremely rude.
Rage from a broken heart, rage that comes from pain and suffering and mental wars with myself. Rage that can't be explained. Rage disturbing to others and to myself but it's a wonderful kind of rage with effects that are as magnificent as gazing at the stars. What this rage does to me almost compares to the effects of Liquor. And for that I am grateful. I rather have rage in me than have Liquor. But I'm way past that now.
You think it's fair to do that to me? To anyone?
Then if I respond you emotionless, you say I got attitude!?
Fuck's wrong with you.
I'm not the problem here. You are.
You disrespected me twice in a row and normally I don't even tolerate disrespect once.
I finally listen to my best friend's advice to move on. To meet other guys. And she thanks God for enlightening my good senses.
I take her advice because I'm sick and exhausted of never knowing were we stand. Were you stand. I'm always left confused after talking to you because you can't make up your mind.
You say no and act yes and expect me to keep cool!?
I've tried moving on before but I couldn't. I still can't but I have to be strong and not look back, because honestly I love myself way too much to allow myself to suffer this way. Whenever I do so I end up hurt and I won't take anymore of this crap.
Not this time buddy, I've had enough of whatever this was. It was breaking and ripping apart every inch of me and I'm way too sassy to let that happen.
I do feel sorry that this didn't work out but you know what... I guess it's just how life is, isn't it?
So I will go now hoping that this decision doesn't ruin our friendship. In fact now we can be friends without all the drama.
I actually feel the inspiration growing inside of me but if I wrote everything that he wants me to write, God help us all.
Greetings from the other side.
Love from Mars.