Saving Me (Frerard)

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"So what's your name?" Ray asks at him from under his giant afro of hair.

"Gerard." He quietly mumbles to the ground. Y'know i just couldn't figure this kid out! Half the time he's bouncing off the walls the other half he's really quiet and reserved; like he can't trust anyone. Hah, he"s a bit like me. We're sitting under this giant maple tree, all the way in the back lot of our school. It's the only place I can sit without getting food and spitballs rickocheted at my head. Sometimes I feel bad because it's my fault everyone hates Ray. He'd probably be a decently popular guy if I wasn't always hanging around him.

"Aren't you going to eat anything?" Gerard looks at me confusedly, and then at Ray acknowledging he's enabling my "destructive" behavior.

"I'm not hungry", I lie for the two hundred billionth time. Of course I'm hungry, I want to say, I haven't eaten anything since yesterday morning and my stomach feels like its devouring itself and I don't know if my legs will support my body when I try to stand up. But I keep my mouth shut and push the thoughts out of my mind, the more I think that way the more likely it is that I will give in and eat something.

" Bullshit." He says. And it startles me. How dare he say I'm lying. He can see right through the mask and its scary, while it also turns me on in an innapropriate way, especially at this moment. 

"What do you mean? Why would I lie?" Because I don't know if I can trust  him or not.

"I've been in the same place, told that same lie over and over." Immediately I don't understand. How could a being as stunning as him feel the way I do? Can he not see what I can? 

"But... you're so hot..." Realizing what I had just said my face immediately flushed and stammering I tried to take back the awkward truth I had just stupidly blurted out, "I mean... I don't like, like you or anything, in a like... Dammit..."

He giggled the cutest, manliest giggle I've ever heard and said,"It's okay. Thanks though." And he smiled, at me. When his eyes met mine my heart tried to leap out of my chest. I feel so pathetic as my body and mind are bending to his every will, like I'm an inexperienced little school boy. Getting up he said, "Well thanks for not making me eat alone, I should get to my locker so I'm not late to Science. See you guys later!" I watch him as he sways his sexy hips back and forth as he walks away.

Ray interrupts my assessing of his backside and daydreaming, "You lovesick puppy dog. I can see it in your eyes."

"Shut up," I say smirking, "don't tell Mikey."