For As Long As I Exist

chapter five

it took me about 15 minutes to calm myself down. I needed to speak to Carlisle to make myself feel better. I now had a sling on my arm until I got the reports back. I slowly got up from the bed and turned to Max.

"I need to go do something. I'll be right back" I told him.

he nodded as I walked out the door and down the hallway. I heard Carlisle's voice followed by two other voices. I peeked around the corner and saw him talking to a boy and a girl about 5 years younger than him. those must be some of his adopted children. I tried my best to overhear what they were saying.

"Carlisle. she's really hurt and is thinking of terrible things. you shouldn't have done that." the younger boy said.

"yes I know, but it was the only way." Carlisle said back.

"he's right Edward. he can't be doing this. she's not one of us." the younger girl said.

the conversation suddenly stopped. I looked back up and saw the three were looking at me. I looked down and shuffled my feet.

Carlisle sighed and turned away, walking down the hall. I began to follow him and passed the two children.

"I'm sorry about him." the boy said to me as he walked away.

I continued to follow Carlisle down the hallway. I shouted his name a few times but he didn't even turn around. he suddenly went into a room that looked like it was his office. i followed him inside.

"miss? did you really refer to me as a miss? what the heck Carlisle. I didn't do anything to you!" I shouted at him a little louder than I expected.

"yes Katie. I referred to you as a miss. you acted like you didn't know me so I treated you the same way." he faced the wall, not looking back.

"you won't even look at me. Carlisle it's obvious that I like you. why can't you realize that?" I asked him.

there was a silence. suddenly he turned around and walked near me. he slowly pushed me up against the wall and looked into my eyes. I started to lean in and he did as well. I could practically feel his smooth lips touching mine, before he stopped midway.

"I want to kiss you so badly my dear." he whispered.

"then do it. Carlisle kiss me." I whispered back to him as if I was pleading.

he pulled away "I can't Katie. I just can't"

"Carlisle let me in. let me talk to you and feel you and love you. just let me in" I tried to get him to look at me again.

"the nurse should be coming to your room anytime now to tell you if you broke you hand or not. you better head that way. I'll walk you" he changed the subject as if what just happened didn't exist.

I sighed and nodded as I began to leave the room. he follow beside me with his hand on my lower back, gesturing me to keep moving.

we didn't say a word the whole way to the room. he walked me inside and helped me sit back down. I looked around for Max and realized he was no longer here. a note sat by the bed.

hey I needed to get back to the vet. let me know if everything is ok. feel better! -max

I sighed at the fact that he was gone. Carlisle began to leave the room when I stopped him.

"will you stay with me?" I asked.

he nodded and walked over to my bedside and sat down. he looked over at me and gave me a half smile that melted my heart. good thing I didn't have a heart monitor on because it would be going crazy right now.

I coughed a little bit because my throat was dry. I needed a drink of water. I began to reach over to grab my water and Carlisle did the same. our hands suddenly touched and I gasped. his hands were ice cold.

"you're so cold. do you need a blanket or something?" I asked him worryingly.

"no no my dear. I'm just.. naturally cold. I'm alright, I promise." he said assuringly.

I nodded and looked away, thinking about all the strange things about him.

"how are you feeling?" he asked me, interrupting my thoughts.

"umm well my arm hurts so bad but I can deal with it. I'm glad I got you so be here with me" I smiled at him.

he smiled back.

the nurse finally came in. she told me I have a broken hand. I sighed at that fact and she took me to the back room to fix my hand and put a cast on it. I came back to my room moments later and Carlisle was still sitting there. I smiled at him and walked over to him. I looked into his eyes and got a little confused

"are you alright my love?" he asked me confused

"y-yes I'm fine. it's just.. your eyes. they were a golden brown earlier and now they're like black. really black." I asked.

he looked down, avoiding eye contact with me. there he goes. avoiding my existence again.

"no no it's just the light in here. it always does that. I need to go now love. I hope to see you soon. just not in a hospital." he laughed nervously.

I giggled slightly and looked at him.

he smiled and kissed my forehead before leaving. I watched as he walked down the hallway and into his office.

"you are one lucky girl." I heard the nurse behind me say.

I turned around and smiled at her.

yes I am. I am one very lucky girl.