borderline » jjk

키스

For the first time in my life I don't try to push time· I don't mind being at school, I'm not that tired by the end of the day, I don't wish I could be asleep for as long as I need to be humanly active. I'm finally alive, this loving flame invaded my heart & unexpectedly changed my world the way I built it. Thinking about it, our long walks and endless talking, his half-smiles , how he holds my hand, those eyes, the way they sparkle. I know I talk about them too much but you can really see his soul in them. Innocent, pure, no matter what his past is like. Oh Jungkook, one of the most kind hearted, genuine, passionate, dedicated, loving and humble people I've ever met. A warrior, he fights every single day of his life the worst enemy anyone could have to face, himself. I don't know much about his state, I don't dare to ask. But I know what this mental illness is and I couldn't be happier that he tries so much to overcome it. I look up to him because of that, his courage is very admirable. I wish he could see himself through my eyes, the hate he's been keeping inside of him towards himself would vanish. Everything sounds so cheesy, but that's exactly what I truly feel.

I'm in class, bored. I'm sketching again, I'm sketching him. I think I'm gonna restart and finish my angel here, now my source of inspiration is way stronger. It's going to be big and magnificent, I want to be very proud of it. After this painfully dull lesson I need to go to this art class our school provides each week, I'm gonna meet the teacher at the entrance so she can give me the supplies and leave. Stupid craft making.

~

Trying to spot her but I can't. But guess who I saw. Why would he be here, his school is half a kilometer away. "Hey" I said with a curious tone.
"What are you doing here?"

"There is my sunshine", he gets up and hugs me. He knows I'm not comfortable with the public so he chooses not to kiss me.

"How was school?" He's looking at me with the cutest smile.

"You know, not too bad. I still don't get what you're doing here though."

"I have a little surprise for you."

"What surprise?"

"You need to follow me."

"I can't leave now, I told you about the art thingy."

"Yeah about that, I set everything, we can go."

"Huh, what did you do?"

"I may or may not have found the teacher and told her that I'm your neighbor and your mom sent me to get you for the supposed appointment she set you for today, you have to perform some blood tests, lady."

I chuckled.
"Damn you, you're trouble.
Well, what's the surprise?"

"Guess you're going to have to find out" and he winks .

I laugh and look at the ground in an effort to hide how the wink made me want to rape his face with my mouth. We walked and passed school, my hands lost in his soft palm felt secure. In the middle of the street he stops.

"Okay, ride."

"Huh?" He's looking at me without realizing the misunderstanding.

"Oh, yeah haha I mean ride this" and points at the motorcycle next to him.

"Alright who did you steal this from? Do you even know how to drive it?"

He's about to sit on the seat.
"I rented it, and I don't like it when I'm being underestimated, missy", he says with a sassy attitude and turns it on. I'm confused.

"Come ooon, I promise not to kill you" and laughs.

"I'm going to be late to home, are you sure you can handle this? It's dangerous!"

He turns his head to the left and lifts his eyebrow, "Do you really think I'd put you in such a danger? It's not going to take too long, I swear."

I'm still a little hesitant, but I prefer to be involved in an accident than eating bean soup for the third day in a row.
"It's not like I have a choice, sir", I sit on the seat and wrap my arms around him. If my mom finds out about this I'm going to be in so much trouble. But at the present, I couldn't give more than 0 fucks.

~

Amazingly he drives really good, this kid is full of surprises. We're out of the town, all kinds of flowers around us and quite a few trees. We stop there and walk, not knowing where we're going. We're holding hands.

"Are there many things left that I don't know about you?"

"Well you know most of me, there are some things though that I don't want you to see."

I'm about to tell him that he can always open up to me but I guess he knew what I was going to say. It's weird that he knows me that that well.

"Yeah nobody can see this side of me, I'm trying to keep it strictly to myself, for the sake of safety."

"I understand.."
I stop and stand in front of him, at this point he needs to know some things.

"Jungkook, I really want you to know that no matter who you think you are, you're way more than that, to me at least. I see a wonderful boy standing in front of me, and the fact that he's struggling on a daily basis without giving up only makes me even more certain that he's worth fighting for."

He's looking at me with an unreadable expression, partly moved partly dissent. "Really.."

He breathes out.
"I don't know if I love you for being the only person in the world to know how fucked up I am that still stays and believes in me, or because you have the most beautiful heart I've ever got to know."

I kissed him, headlong and passionately. I'm not the kind of girl to act like that but this felt so right, it was the most sincere and appropriate thing to do at that moment. When he told me that, which I've never even imagined i'd ever be told, I felt this ache in my heart, something like an electric heartbeat. The special connection with him is unreal, is too early to say I'm in love? He smiles. "I love you too, angel."

~

We're walking, talking and laughing. I love it. It must be very late, we gotta go home.

"Shit, I'm so sorry, if you want I can tell your mother that's my fault."

"It's fine, I'll tell her I was in art class."

He drives me home, two streets away actually so that my parents won't know. I'm getting off the motorcycle, he looks concentrated.

"Hey, I'm working tomorrow so how about coming over to my house on Sunday? My mom will be there too."

I'm standing still, I'm a bit shocked.
"Uuh like meeting her..?"

"Well yeeah, but just to hang out mostly, what do you say?"

I didn't quite expect that, I mean things are getting more serious that I thought.

"Uh sure, I'll try to come, how did this come up though?"

"Lets just say that today made me realize a lot. Can't I bring my girlfriend home?"

I blush.
"Haha if this is what it is about then I'll definitely come."

He kisses me goodbye.
''I'll text you later, take care sunshine."