Prude Secret • Jikook

1 • Virgin Lips

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Jimin's POV

"Stay strong Ji!!! Always smile!"

Those were my mom's words to cheer me up and make me strong. I always kept it in mind, but thinking about going to school is enough to feel drowned in anxiousness and suffer from my awareness about being liked by nobody.

I love studying, but I hate school. Why? Because it's a place where I can get instant judgments and insults even just by simply breathing. It made me so self-conscious and apprehensive. From how I look, to how I behave. I've been trying to act calculatedly but I still feel like I'm being weird in everyone's eyes.

Their unknown hatred makes me sick. I don't like this bullying. Nobody should like it. But they just do, especially to someone like me.

Maybe because I'm quite different from their idea of normal.

I tightened my grip on the shoulder straps of my backpack when I approached the school entrance. I nudged my eyeglasses up when I looked up, the big words Chocolate High School were beyond the gate. Sighs, I couldn't wait for graduation to come.

I remembered when Ms. Julie, my benefactor, personally guided me in this school for transferring. I was wearing my favorite light blue polo. I'd tucked it in, as usual. I was also wearing brown khaki pants and black dress shoes at that time, my orange-brown hair was slightly quiff on the side. She must have noticed that I was nervous when I heard her say that everything will be fine. It'd calmed me down somehow, I had reciprocated her genuine smile to assure her I'm okay.

While I was filling out the transfer application form, I had already got rude comments from the seniors about what I was wearing . I just shrugged it off because I thought I could only experience it once. I'd thought they would get tired of judging my way of expressing myself as time goes by. I'd thought they would understand me. I was wrong.

Ever since my freshman year, they made sure I was receiving acerbic words about my being prude. They even made fun of how cheap my clothes were and how weird I was for having the guts to wear those in this school, knowing it was one of the most expensive schools in South Korea where the majority of the students are raised by affluent families, politicians, celebrities, and company owners.

Just like now, I was wearing a white long polo and black khaki pants together with my worn-out black dress shoes and rainbow socks. This has been my style ever since I was a kid. I know fashion trend changes through time, but since I'm a sucker for vintage styles, I stuck myself into it.

I inhaled sharply when I started to take steps in the corridor. I timidly lowered my head and tried to focus my attention on my anxious walk as their glances that have a hint of disgust might distract me on my way.

"What a sight to start a day."

"Look! The Prude Prince is still studying here!"

"What the hell? I'd expected him to transfer to a cheap school last year. He's just ruining this school's reputation,"

"Some annoying people like him already left this school, that's so brave of him to stay,"

"Hi, little virgin,"

"Isn't it sad that nobody's interested in fucking him?"

"Of course he's wearing those cheap grandpa clothes and cringy socks again!"

"Gosh, he still looks like a beggar, but at least he doesn't smell like one,"

I used to hate being ignored and forgotten before. But my perspective has changed the first few times I had gotten exposed to their hatred for people like me. I had realized, being invisible is way better than having this kind of attention.