can i tell you a secret? ; halsanie (third book in the pinky promise series)

ashley's letter

january 17th, 4:08am

this isn't fair. i'm beyond repair because of you. you ruined her. you ruined me. i know well who you are. i know exactly why you did it. i know all about you. you thought i forgot? no. you're unknown. you killed my friends one at a time in my dream. and now, in this delusion called reality, you're planning to kill me.

go ahead. kill me.

i don't care anymore. i'm nothing without her anyway.

it feels like i'm constantly walking on broken glass just to get over her. but it's useless. i can't get over her. i loved her and i still do. and you took her away from me.

you took away my everything. you took the girl with the wild colors in her hair. you took away the girl with the brightest eyes i've seen in this sad world. you took away the one person who loved me for me. you took away my sunshine.

and i will never forgive you for that. you shot her, and for what? because you thought it would change the fact that she didn't love you?

or did you just think that if you couldn't have her, i shouldn't have her?

i hate you. you're selfish and twisted. you should've left melanie out of your sick little game. you should've killed me, not her. you should've left her alone. it's not fucking fair. she didn't deserve this. she didn't deserve any of this.

i still remember your name, but i dare not write it. your name leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. in that sick, twisted dream, you were the kindest person i'd met. but in real life? you're a selfish psycho. i hope you rot in hell for what you've done. who knows? maybe i'll rot in hell with you.

you're the reason i can barely get out of bed in the morning. the reason i can't sleep at night. the reason i break down at the most sudden of times. the reason i curse my existence. the reason i've lost my friends. the reason i can't trust anyone anymore.

don't you see what you've done? you've caused so much damage just by killing her. and honestly, what did you gain by killing her? you have to hide now. you have to fear being recognized as her murderer. you can't socialize because people could report you to the police.

i would report you, but what would that gain me? it's not going to bring melanie back, so why waste my time?

so please, kill me as soon as you can. i know you've been wanting to. i'm the reason you couldn't have melanie.

i'm sick of living with this disgusting race anyway.

~you know exactly who this is, why should should i have to sign my name?