Half Complete

I Am Clarie

"NOOOO" I screamed. I opened my eyes. It was morning,  sunlight struck my face and made the dust particles in the air glitter with  an unusual sheen. I rubbed my face and stretched my arm as the last traces of sleep fled my body. What a weird experience.But the dream was getting blurrier by the second, slipping through my memory like water held in a hand.But I shouldn't be disturbed by some stupid dream.A knock sounded at my door and a lady wearing the standard maid uniform and a sweet smile entered.I grinned, Mary was punctual as usual.She pulled back the drape over my bed and opened my cupboard, taking my clothes out.Just another boring day.

                           "Well Mary what's my agenda today" I asked her.

"Miss Clarie ,you were supposed to have etiquette lessons today but you're teacher suddenly called in sick. It seems" she glared at me . I directed my most innocent and angelic smile at her. Mary sighed and continued "she ate something that disagreed with her constitution yesterday. "

    "Oh and so the commander asked you to come for practice the entire day as your match is coming up. "She finished.

     I was absolutely delighted. No stuffy nobles and horrid remarks today. Traning was exhausting and I usually couldn't even walk properly after a hard spar but it was worth it.Going to the court was even more draining. I lifted the covers and jumped out of bed and ran to take my dress from Mary's nimble hands.

                              I am Clarie, the daughter of a noble, the second and middle one in fact.My father and mother own a big estate and my father was one of the twelve  feudal lords appointed by the late king and governed the province of Tourmaline. It was the southernmost and there was deep forest between it and the capital.So we were rarely visited by the King and most of the governance was done by my father alone.Lord Column was an imposing man and ruled the lands with a just hands, or that is what I heard the locals say. He had an army that served him under the King's name. And the lady Belinda is said to be the epitome of grace and beauty.

                                                                     My elder sister Katrine was taught governance and the entire province would go to her and the one she would marry in the future. My younger sister Lucinda was the beauty of the family and my mother's most beloved daughter. She was an arrogant child and a spoilt brat who spent her entire time either fussing over her appearance or making other people's life an absolute hell.But she was a little angel in front of mother and all the visiting aristocrats positively admired her.

      I , on the other hand was an unwanted creature with a horrible curse. I was born with only one arm. It was a common belief that disabled people were cursed and would bring ill luck to the household. My horrified mother had basically abandoned me at birth , she had handed me over to Mary's mother, her attendant. Mary's mother had passed away when I was 10 years old. Then Mary became my closest confidant and friend.
         
I was the first in our family to bear this curse.My mother hated me for it and was quite vocal about it.I tried to avoid her as much as possible.I had overheard her complaining that I was the one who had brought misfortune to the kingdom and that I should be sent away.But for some reason or the other my father opposed her.The Lord Column who basically worshipped the ground his wife walked on was fighting with her.It was a main topic of discourse among the servants.I always wore long sleeved dresses with bulky shawls to hide my hand so only a few knew of my curse. I was immediately hidden away when the aristocrats came to visit and rumours spread that the middle child was hideous, disfigured.The servants never knew that they could be overheard in their chats.I had a handful of elderly teachers who looked upon me with disdain save for one.I hated it, had hated myself for all the trouble and had even tried to run away once.But something had happened that changed me 

                   "Are you ready ,Miss" Mary's voice jolted me from my thoughts.There was no need to sink into depression now.I had a wonderful day before me.And I didn't have to hide now like the earlier days.I grabbed the only short sleeved tunic I had from Mary and ran to the training grounds through the pathways used by the servants. They were amused as usual seeing me run with Mary trailing behind me urging me to be more cautious. ..

               " Your late" a voice said as I ran up. The owner , a middle aged man with a sword in his hand smiled at me . His eyes, framed by wrinkles were glinting and his posture was relaxed, so i guess he was just teasing me.Dorian; the commander of my father's army and it was his personal job to train all the recruits.

          Most people raised their eyebrows when they came to know of my passion. "How can a girl with no arm use a sword." My sister had bluntly asked me one day after finding the sword I had hidden in my room. But rigorous and continuous practice had made me excel in a sport many had thought impossible for a girl like me.Now at 16 I could even beat some of the recruits in a fight.

                     My father was a kind of a person who believed that both girls and boys should have equal rights. So the sight of a woman in the army or administration was not uncommon. As I watched Dorian instructing some soldiers my mind travelled back a few years.....

                I remembered the day quite well. It was the day that I finally had enough from my family.A noble was visiting and my sister was happy that day, showing off the new dress she got in a more spiteful way than any seven year old could.I was ten then, a scared wisp of a thing but even I was excited.She told of gifts that he would bring and the army display.I was excited , I asked Mary's mother about my dress...but was met by an almost pitiful stare.I faltered."Oh.don't you know?Mother said that you're not allowed", her cute lisping voice was sharp ,"She doesn't want any bad thing to happen.You're cursed aren't you" she gave me a little push"You don't deserve it..you bring misfortune and no one likes you.Now go away cursed sister".

                     I stumbled.there was a hand on my shoulder, I shook it and ran away.I was in the servant's alleys.there were two people in front of me.I hid behind a pillar "Were do you think miss Clarie will be hidden?"One asked the other"Oh,the lord will do something.Poor man, he is such a virtuous person, don't know why he was cursed with a cursed child like her?".I would run away, far away.I had escaped through a door and ran till my legs gave out.I was tired, thirsty and my dress was torn.I was in a part of the manor that i had never visited before.I collapsed on the ground and wrapped my shawl tighter around my body. Dorian had found there sniffing and crying. He asked me what had happened and seemed like a kindly old uncle that I felt myself breaking down. I told him everything that had happened to me expecting either scorn or sympathy.But I got neither. He just smiled and asked me in what way was I inferior to them. I felt rage coursing through me then. I just stood up and yanked my empty sleeve so hard that it tore."isn't being cursed more than enough?"I had sobbed.

        But he had  just laughed."That my dear ,is not a disability or a curse. It could be your greatest strength. Come with me and I'll show you" he said and walked away.
           I was still a bit angry but my curiosity got the better of me. I had hurriedly wrapped my shawl around myself and ran after him wondering what he was going to show me........