Chapter 1 female comebacks:
Me and a friend used at least six of these on some people and laughed so hard. Actually she did. I felt guilty when one kid looked like he was about to break down so I gave him a hug. Apparently he was dared to hit on me (-_-') meaners... But now me, him, and her are BFFs so all is good (^∇^) oh and some of these are from online too.
Man: Where have you been all my life?
Woman: Hiding from you.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
Man: If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put u and i together
Woman: Really, I'd put f and u together
Man: there's something wrong with your phone... My numbers not in it
Woman: sorry AT&T has a no idiots number policy
Man: hey baby what's your number
Woman: it's 612-REJECTION-HOTLINE
I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
Man: "I'd go through anything for you."
Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account. Then the door."
Man: "I want to give myself to you"
Woman: "Sorry I don't accept cheap gifts."
It's a good thing I have my library card, because I'm checking you out.
Oh, sorry, I'm reserved for someone else.
Can I get your number?
My number? Which one do you want?
How many numbers you got?
Oh, I got numbers comin' outta my ears. For instance: ten.
Ten?
Yeah. That's how many months old my baby girl is.
You got a little girl?
Yeah. Yeah, sexy, huh? How 'bout this for a number? Six. That's how old my other daughter is, eight is the age of my son, two is how many times I've been married - and divorced; sixteen is the number of dollars I have in my bank account. 850-3943. That's my phone number, and with all the numbers I gave you, I'm guessing zero is the number of times you're gonna call it!
A/N: the next chapter will be madea so stay tuned!