The Almost Chosen Ones: The Longbottom Twins (A Harry Potter Fan Fiction)

Howlers, Lockhart, Ugly Plant Babies and Other Obnoxious Things

 The next morning I woke up in my bed sticky with sweat, which was strange since I could have sworn I fell asleep in the common room. I must have just gotten up sometime and went to bed. I shrugged it off and headed for the showers to wash off the rest of my nightmare and start the day off fresh.

Nev and I sat down at the Gryffindor table next to Hermione who was reading her copy of Voyages with Vampires propped against a milk jug as she ate. Ron and Harry joined us as I was pouring some coffee. "Morning." Hermione said stiffly, obviously still not happy with the boys big entrance yesterday. We were a bit more cheerful with our morning greetings. Well, as cheerful as I could be with only one cup of coffee and a bad nights sleep. I could barely remember the nightmare anymore, except for a faint hissing in the darkness.

"Mail's due any minute –– I think Gran's sending a few things that I forgot." I hope she sends my Gryffindor scarf too. Not even a few minutes later came the swooshing of wings as about a hundred owls streamed in carrying the morning post. Gazi swooped above and dropped a large, lumpy package on my head and a second later something large and gray fell into Hermione's jug, spraying us all with milk and feathers. "Errol!" Ron yelled as he pulled the bedraggled owl out by its feet. Errol slumped, unconscious, onto the table, his legs in the air and a damp red envelope in his beak. "Oh, no––" Ron gasped with fear. "It's all right, he's still alive," Hermione said, prodding Errol gently with the other end of her fork. "It's not that––it's that."

To Harry and Hermione it was just a red envelope. What harm could an envelope do? Ron, Nev and I knew otherwise. That baby's about to blow. "What's the matter?" Harry asked full of ignorance of the common punishments of the magical community. "She's –– she's sent me a Howler," Ron said faintly. "You'd better open it Ron," Nev said in a timid whisper. "It'll be worse if you don't. My gran sent us one once and we ignored it and"––he gulped––"it was horrible." I shuddered and cast my eyes down as I remembered the incident he was talking about. Harry and Hermione's gaze flickered between the red envelope and our apprehensive faces. "What's a Howler?" he asked, but Ron's attention hadn't shifted from the letter. "Open it," Nev insisted. "It'll all be over in a few minutes–"

"I would probably take it and run. While you still can..." I added. Ron stretched out a shaking hand, eased the envelope from Errol's beak, and slit it open. Here it comes... Nev and I put our hands over our ears to protect us from the imminent vocal explosion.

"––STEALING THE CAR, I WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SURPRISED IF THEY EXPELLED YOU, YOU WAIT TILL I GET A HOLD OF YOU, I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU STOPPED TO THINK WHAT YOUR FATHER AND I WENT THROUGH WHEN WE SAW IT WAS GONE––"

Mrs. Weasley's yells echoed off of the stone walls of the Great Hall, making the plates and spoons rattle on the table. Throughout the Great Hall everyone was swiveling and craning their necks to find out who got the Howler. Ron slowly sank into his chair to avoid the stares as his face turned Weasley red to match his hair.

"––LETTER FROM DUMBLEDORE LAST NIGHT. I THOUGHT YOUR FATHER WOULD DIE OF SHAME, WE DIDN'T BRING YOU UP LIKE THIS, YOU AND HARRY COULD HAVE BOTH DIED––"

Harry began to fidget uncomfortably in his seat once his name was brought up. Despite being a magical celebrity, Harry hated attention.

"ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED––YOUR FATHER'S FACING AN INQUIRY AT WORK AND IT'S ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT! IF YOU PUT ANOTHER TOE OUT OF LINE WE'LL BRING YOU STRAIGHT BACK HOME!"

Complete silence rung throughout the Great Hall. You could have heard a knut drop. The Howler, that had fell through Ron's mortified fingers, burst into flames and curled into ashes. We were still all frozen with shock. Well, that was awkward. Unfortunately the same could not be said for the rest of the Great Hall as gradually a babble of talk and giggles broke out again. Hermione closed Voyages with Vampires and looked down at the top of Ron's head. "Well, I don't know what you expected, Ron, but you––"