Paint You Wings (All Time Low)

Chapter 9

*Alex's p.o.v*

When Bryan turned up me and Jasey said our goodbyes and headed back to the bus. When we were out of sight of them, Jasey jumped up into my arms.

"Alex, do you know how much I love you right now?!" She squealed. I laughed, I wish she meant it when she said she loved me, she was joking obviously.

"I'm the best aren't I?" I joked

"yes yes yes yes yes!" She shouted, I laughed at her excitement. I was really falling for her. But if I tell her and she doesn't feel the same way, I'll ruin I friendship, everything will be awkward and I'll feel like an idiot. She waved her hand in front of my face distracting me from my thoughts. "Earth to Alex" She laughed. "You spaced out." We walked back to the bus, Zack and Jack being the only ones there.

"Dude, I want my best friend for a couple of hours, mind if I steal her?" Zack asked as soon as we stepped through the door.

"Sure" I laughed.

"Don't I get a say in this?" Jasey whined from the kitchen.

"Don't you want to spend time with me?" Zack asked, faking to be hurt by her question.

"I do Zacky, I do!" she exclaimed as she ran into him for a hug. They said goodbye and headed out the door.

I slumped onto the seat next to Jack. "Was she happy?"

"Meeting her favourite band? Yes" I laughed. "She couldn't form words when they were introduced. But when we got talking she was ok, when we left she was like 'alex I love you' and wouldn't stop thanking me" I laughed.

"She said she loved you?" Jack asked shocked.

"She was joking" I sighed.

"And by that sigh you just let out, im guessing you wish she wasn't joking?" I looked at him and groaned. "That's a yes" Jack laughed. "Just tell her you like her man!"

"I wish it was that easy." I mumbled under my breath.



*Jasey p.o.v*

"So where we off to?" I asked Zack as we walked down the street.

"How about we go for dinner? I'm starving" I laughed and agreed.

"Wait" I suddenly said, he stopped and turned to face me. "I didn't bring any money."

"It's on me" He smiled.

"Are you sure?" He nodded. "I'll pay you back as soon as we get back to the bus okay?"

"You will not" He laughed. I went to protest but he gave me a look saying 'shut up' so I did. We found a small place to eat and ordered. Zack looked like he was about to say something but something-or should I say someone, stopped him.

"Oh my god it's Zack Merrick!" A girly voice announced. Zack groaned. I waited patiently as he took pictures and signed autographs. "Is she your girlfriend?" One asked which made me choke on the water I was drinking, causing them to laugh. Back in school everyone thought I was dating Zack because we were so close, but just like he's doing now, he explained how we were just best friends. By the time out food came, his fans had left us in peace. We talked about when I had met the members of We Are The In Crowd today and how I'm enjoying the tour so far, even though it's only been a few days. We finished and left to go back to the bus. Alex and Jack were still sitting in the lounge area, but now Evan, Grieco and Jeff were with them. I went to join them but Zack pulled me back into the bunks.

"What are you doing?"

"We have to talk about something." Did we? I didn't answer him I just sat across from him on my bunk. "I wanted to talk about this earlier but fans and stuff, and I didn't want them to overhear." He explained. I looked at him to continue. "You haven't said a word about your past to me since you've got here Jas, please tell me what happened when I left?" He pleaded.

I sighed and took a deep breath. "Well after you left things got worse, you weren't there to make me feel better." He pulled me into a hug. "He went to jail about 5 years ago" I scratched at my wrist as the memory's made their way back into my head.

"I see these have gotten worse, Jas" He said as he held my arm in his hand. He lifted my hoodie sleeve showing my scars. "I never knew it got this bad. I'm so sorry for leaving." His eyes were red, as if he were about to cry but was holding it in.

"It's not your fault Zacky, you couldn't stick around forever." Tears were running down my cheeks. Even though Zack was older than me, we always hung around in school. He was only in the year above me when he moved.

"Have you told anyone about it? Except from me?"

"Aby knows most of it, I didn't really go into detail though" He nodded.

"Have you told Alex anything about it?" Before I could speak a voice came from the doorway.

"Told Alex what?" I turned to see Alex standing in the doorway. I looked back at Zack confused.

"Why would I tell Alex?" Zack looked at Alex then back at me and gave me a nod of encouragement, telling me I should tell him. He gave me a tight hug

"Because I know he cares for you a lot, you also care for him too" He whispered in my ear before he left us alone.

"What's going on?" He sat in the space on my bunk that Zack had previously occupied.



"Do you really want me to tell you?" I asked quietly.

"Yes Jas, go on."

"Okay, but please don't think any different of me or judge me?" He pulled me into a hug.

"Of course I won't, tell me" I pulled away and pulled down my sleeve before he could see the marks. I'd rather explain my story to him first, before he sees my scars.

"When I was 7 my mom died. The two of us were coming home from the park one day, and I saw my friend on the other road but I didn't think and I just ran."

Alex took my hand in his, rubbing circles on the back of my hand with his thumb.

"She ran after me of course, but she got hit by a car." Tears lined my eyes, I blinked a few times, hoping they wouldn't fall. "It was a hit and run accident and I got the whole blame from my dad. But he seemed to be the only one who blamed me."

I broke down tears running down my cheeks. Alex pulled me into a hug rubbing my back.

"My younger brother, Liam, who was only 1 at the time, had to live with my grandma because my dad was normally at work so it was only my older brother, Josh that I had to turn to, until I met Zack. Josh moved out after 3 years because he would constantly argue with my dad, so when he threw a punch at Josh he left and I haven't heard from him since. Since the accident my dad wouldn't talk to me at all. So when it was just us two living in the house he would constantly shout at me, even if I didn't do anything wrong. I got bullied at school a lot because I didn't have a mom anymore. When I was around 10 it got worse. He would hit me, punch me, kick me, whatever he felt like doing, he did. It went on until I was 17. I'm stupid for not getting out of there sooner."



"It wasn't your fault, and you're not stupid" He hugged me again, and I stayed in his arms while I finished.

"At 14, I found about self-harming. So I tried it, and I helped a lot. I feel so ashamed about it now though, it makes me look so ugly."

"Oh Jasey" Alex sighed. "Did you do it on your wrists" I nodded and he started to life my sleeves but I pulled away.

"No, its disgusting" He didn't listen to me, he pulled my sleeve up once more, I watched his reaction as he looked at my scars. My right arm was littered with scars that are the arm I mostly wore bracelets on all the time, the only time I didn't was when I wore clothes with long sleeves. My left arm only had a few, which didn't look too obvious. I was afraid he was going to be appalled by me, but surprisingly be pulled my arm to his mouth, kissing over the scars. I looked up at him; I placed a kiss on my forehead before telling me to carry on.

"At first I rarely done it, only when he hurt me bad, but then it would be every night. It got so bad that I started to cut on my thighs so it wasn't visible to others."

"You wore shorts the other day, I didn't see anything." He quietly said.

"It only really scarred right at the top, I won't wear shorts that show my scars" He nodded and I continued. "It was the same shit every day, I would go to school, get bullied, called an attention seeker or an emo because I cut, I would come home and do chores and even if I did everything right, my dad would find something wrong with it, it'd get beat, go to my room, cut and go to sleep."

"Well your scars are not ugly, because your beautiful Jasey." He placed a kiss on my temple before carrying on. "Didn't you have anyone to turn to?"

"I had Zack for a while, he helped and I didn't cut so much, but he left and it just got worse again."

"Boyfriends?" He curiosuly asked, this was a story i also hated telling.

"When I was around 16, I found a boy that I thought liked me. He didn't go to my school so he didn't know about my scars or my dad. We dated for about a month; he saw my arms one day and claimed he was fine with it. But one day I caught him cheating on me with a girl who was also supposed to be my friend. He said it was too much hassle having a girlfriend with scars, that he didn't like them so he left me."

"He's such a twat." Alex angrily mumbled.

"Anyway, when I was 17 my dad was arrested when my neighbour walked in on him putting a boiling hot pan on my back, he took me to the hospital and phoned the police. I moved in with my gran who wouldn't stop crying, she blamed herself she letting me stay there and she should of noticed what was going on. I rarely saw her so how could she. Then I met Aby at college and she became my best friend, we moved to Baltimore to get away from Boston and here I am." I gave sad smile, tears were still running out of my eyes and down my cheeks, he just pulled me closer. I hadn't noticed he was crying too until I heard a little sob leave his lips.

"I'm so sorry Jas, I really am" We lay down on my bunk, holding each other when I crying started all over again. Alex was rubbing circles onto my back while my head was buried into his chest. I must have tired myself out with all the crying because I started falling to sleep.



*Alex's p.o.v*

"Aww look at them, they are so cute!" Someone's voice squeaked.

"Shut up Jack, you'll wake them!" That voice sounded like Vinny.

I peeked one eye open; Jasey was still lying in my arms. Her story last night shocked me; I didn't know she went through that. I obviously cared about her way more than I thought I did, hence all the tears I shed for her. She was still beautiful to me, even with her scars. They didn't change who she was at all. I heard a click from a camera and sniggers coming from outside the bunk.

"Fuck off, I'm trying to sleep" That one came from Jasey; I didn't know she was awake. The ones who were in the room just laughed before leaving. "I'm sorry about last night" She looked up at me.

"You don't need to be sorry." I snuggled into her and we lay there, enjoying each other's company, until we both drifted back off to sleep.



"Alex, get up! You have sound check in an hour" Matt's voice rung throughout the back of the bus. I groaned, waking up Jasey.