Tearing Down Walls

Tearing Down Walls 34

Chapter 34 Havannah

            “Vannah! Stop!” I shook my head and kept running. I was an idiot though seeing as Harry was way faster than me. I should’ve taken the car. I ran clear down the street and through the alleys of our little small town before I ran completely out of breath and collapsed against the wall in one of the dimly lit alleys. I didn’t see him anywhere, so I took that as a good sign. I couldn’t face him. Not after I ended everything we worked so hard to keep. But he’s the one who cheated again. He’s the one who was always lying. I can’t be one of those girls who can’t live without a boy. I just can’t. That’s how my mom was. I heard footsteps coming down the alley and I froze. “Vannah please.” I knew he had been crying or that he still was. I felt bad and instantly wanted to comfort him, but this was my idea. “Just let me explain.” He called out into the emptiness. I sighed and stood up. The moment he saw me he ran, but I put my hand up just before he got to me. He wiped his tear soaked cheeks off with the back of his hand. “Havannah I’m so sorry.” I shook my head. I’ve had enough “sorry’s” in my life that I didn’t need to hear anymore.

            “Why.” It came out as barely a whisper, but he heard it. I couldn’t look at him. Not when he was crying and vulnerable. That’s when I would melt in his hands and forget why I was mad in the first place. “Why do you always insist on hurting me?” he sighed.

            “I was drunk. I didn’t mean to. She was just there and I missed you-”

            “So why didn’t you just call me? You could’ve done that if you had time to get drunk. You should’ve said no Harry.” I was starting to get angry. He missed me, so he slept with another girl? That just doesn’t sit well with me.

            “I tried it didn’t work! She was so demanding and-”

            “You’re freaking six foot and she was like five! I’m pretty sure you could’ve gotten away if you wanted to, but you didn’t want to did you? You wanted to sleep with her. Then you were going to come back here and act like nothing. Ever. Happened.” I shook my head. “God I’m so stupid!” I started to walk away. I couldn’t stand there a moment longer before I would hit him or kiss him. Stupid emotions!

            “Havannah!” he grabbed my arm and I went to pull away, but he tightened his grip.

            “Let go Harry. You tried to stop me it didn’t work. Now I’m demanding you to let me go.” I narrowed my eyes and looked at him finally. “Lies won’t get you anywhere. Look who’s free to sleep with whoever they want? You got just what you wanted. You don’t have me anymore. I have more important things to deal with, like getting custody of my siblings next week. Or what TV show is on tonight.” He rolled his eyes.

            “You can’t possibly mean what you’re saying right now.” I raised my eyebrows and smiled.

            “Oh really? Let me dumb it down for you. I.” I pointed to myself. “And you.” I pointed at Harry. “Are no longer together.” I yanked my arm out of his loosening grip. “Did you get it that time?” I pushed past him and started my long walk home. Tears streamed down my face. I didn’t really want him to go, it’s just that. I can’t be the idiot who runs back every time. The hurt on his face when I said those last words were enough to give me a major migraine. I had to say them. I had to act like I didn’t care. Right?

********************

Sometimes I hate every single stupid word you say,

Sometimes I wanna slap you in your whole face,

There’s no one quite like you,

You push all my buttons down,

I know life would suck without you,

At the same time, I wanna hug you

I wanna wrap my hands around your neck,

You’re an asshole, but I love you

The open window, to the house I was sitting against, was blaring this stupid idiotic song. I used to love it. Now it’s all just a lie. Every stupid word. I got up and began walking home now in the dark. Yes. I, the idiot, waited til it was dark to walk home through alleys. Don’t judge.

Harry.

 He’s going to be there when I get home. He’s going to notice that I cried. I let out a big sigh along with some more tears. My body must be programmed to never run out of tears. Just as I was about to turn into another alley, two arms wrapped around me. “Look what we got here.” I was too weak to fight back and quite frankly I didn’t have anything to live for now that Harry’s gone. “You’re not going to fight back?” Jordan. I sighed and shook my head.

            “What do you want?” I asked in an uninterested tone. The corners of his mouth crept up into his smirk.

            “Another paparazzi photo.” He let go of me and grabbed my hand. A bright flash went off. Claire stepped out of the darkness.

            “This isn’t any fun if you don’t fight back.” She stopped and a sickly smile grew on her face. “You guys broke up.” She laughed. “I tried to tell you he was not interested, but you didn’t listen. You thought you were something special. Turns out me and your old man were right.” I didn’t say anything because she was right. He didn’t love me or want me or need me. I just thought he did. I turned around to leave and Claire tapped my shoulder. I looked at her and she punched me in the face. “Feel humiliated yet?” I just kept walking. Nothing could make this worse than it already is.

            When I got home everyone jumped up at the sight of me. My clothes were black and dirty, my face was horribly bruised and swollen. But he just sat there. He never cared. I pushed past all the people who were crowding me. “I hope you find what you were looking for Harry. I really do.” He looked the other way and ignored me, but his eyes became watery again. I leaned down and kissed his temple before returning to my room. Everyone looked at me like I was a psycho with my bipolar mood swings, but the truth of the matter was, I didn’t plan on making it through the night. Literally and figuratively.

A/N: SORRYSORRYSORRYSORRYSORRYSORRYSORRY FOR NOT UPDATING IN LIKE FOREVER! Writer's block played a huge part in it, but I also had family things going on. So I don't like this chapter but I wanted to update for you guys before I went to my Aunt's. 

IMPORTANT!!

I think this book is going to only have 45 chapters! SO that means about ten chapters left! there will be no sequel or blah blah blah but I might do an epilogue (Spelling is right I think) So tell me what you think about that!

LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!

Kalisha

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