Eyes Wide Shut

Chapter 22

Frankie’s POV

            The meds had knocked me out, sending me into a black oblivion where I wasn’t sure if I would even wake up. But when I did, it all rushed back to me. Everything. I twinged with pain at the slightest movement. My mouth let out a groan.

            “Babe, take these,” Mollie demanded softly, as she stuck her hands out towards me, offering some pills and a glass of water.

            “How are you feeling?” she asks as I swallow down the water. She begins stroking my hair.

            “Everything…” I breathe. “Hurts.”

            I can feel her sorrowful eyes on me, but I can’t bear to meet them. I know what she’s thinking, it’s like I can hear her thoughts running through mine. The immense guilt that I know she feels. But I can’t help but go back to what he said to me. Maybe I should just give him what he wants. Let her go back and run into his arms because he was right; if I hadn’t left Wayne she would have never left David. And maybe she would be happier, not having to take care of me and let me get in the way of her free spirit. Maybe that would make it all go away. But I couldn’t just tell her that.

            “What’s wrong, babe?” She always knew when I wasn’t okay.

I swallow before I speak.

            “I – I don’t deserve you,” I mutter under my breath.

            “What?” she whimpers, her face shocked.

            “I don’t-I don’t deserve you. I’m just so- so stupid-”

            “Stop it, Frankie,” and I close my mouth trying not to cry. She’s angry. She breathes heavily trying to contain her apparent frustration.

            “I knew this would happen. I knew he would get to you. Don’t you see what he did to you?”

            “Yeah… but what I did was worse,” I confess.

            “Are you kidding me-”

            “I ruined your relationship!”

            “Then couldn’t I say the same thing about what I did to you and Wayne?”

            Beat.

            “You left him for me because you loved me,” she takes advantage of my pause.

            “But-”

            “But nothing!” She grips my face. I cringe in pain. She’s trying to grab my attention, but I can’t focus on anything but the immense pain that she is causing.

            “Ow, Mollie,” but she grips harder. The gash on face stings and the bruises on my face throb.

            “Mollie! That hurts!”

            “Are you angry?”

            “Yeah! Ow, Mollie, stop!” and she releases her grip. I catch a few tears crawling down my cheeks.

            “So you get angry with me for gripping your damaged face, but you can’t get angry at him who put you in this condition!” she aggressively yells as she points to the marks on my face. My heart takes a beating.

            “That’s different-”

             “Look what he did to you!”