Secret Letters Part 13

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sorry i haven't been uploading in forever. so busy. and sorry this is uber short. but it's something. this one's ending soon, as you can tell. well enjoy..........

13.

“tell me something, what are we gonna do now?” I said as we sat on the floor of my dorm. After the concert, Sebastian walked me home. It was silent most of the way. We were both in deep thought. There were so many questions to be asked. “It’s really up to you.” Sebastian said. He was sitting across me on the floor. I had my knees to my chest and arms around them. “What do you want?” I said. “you know what that is.” He said, looking directly into my eyes. “You do know I can’t move back right.” My parents wouldn’t allow me to transfer back. There were too many things I had to do to transfer back. Besides, I was getting used to the cloudiness of Seattle. “And you are not moving here. No. you have that beautiful home and school.” I added. Sebastian frowned. “well, where does that leave us?” he said. I shrugged. “long distance. I mean I could visit and vice versa.” I said. “it will be difficult.” He said. I frowned. “very” Sebastian moved closer to me so that he was sitting next to me. He pulled me to him. “it is only temporary. Till we figure out something. I’ll visit every weekend if I have to.” He said. I smiled. “that’ll be costly. “ I said. I would love for him to visit every weekend, but it wasn’t possible. I didn’t know if I could handle the whole long distance thing. It was something I never done. It seemed difficult. I wouldn’t be able  to touch and hold him when I wanted. Only to hear and see him online or by phone. The idea sounded unbearable. “It doesn’t matter.” Sebastian said. I rested my head on his shoulder. He was warm. It was quiet for a moment. Sebastian started to hum a tune I didn’t know. It was relaxing. “You’re making me sleepy.” I said. I was exhausted. “sorry. Did you want to go to bed? I could leave.” He said. I frowned. “or you can stay.” I said. I didn’t want to be separated from him anymore. “I’d love that.” He said. I stood and pulled Sebastian with me. We laid in bed. “I don’t want you go.” I said. Sebastian had to leave the next day. He had a meeting on Sunday that was mandatory. “I don’t want to leave either.” He said. Jayla frowned. “It’ll be fine. We’ll see each other soon.” Jayla tried to be optimistic. “Yes we will.” He said. I yawned. “you should sleep.” He whispered. “okay.” I didn’t want to sleep. But my body thought otherwise.  I faced Sebastian and kissed his lips. “Good night.” I said. “Night.” He whispered and wrapped his arms around me. I fell asleep instantly.

“I wish you didn’t have to leave” I said as we stood at the airport. Sebastian only had one carry on. The day went by too fast. We ate out and went sightseeing. Also a lot of catching up on. He was still the same guy. “I wish I didn’t need to leave either.” He said, pulling me into a tight embrace. It was tough to say good bye. The intercom announced the gates that were open and Sebastian sighed. “That’s my gate.” He said. “I’ll miss you.” I said. Sebastian bent down and kissed me softly. “I’ll miss you too.” He said. I frowned. “You should go now. I’ll see you soon.” I said. “Yes you will. I love you Jayla.” He said. “I love you too.” I really didn’t want him to leave but it couldn’t be helped. He gave me one last kiss and headed to his gate. I watched as he left.

After the airport I went straight to Landon’s house. I wanted to see how he was doing and how things went with Rai. I felt bad for ditching him and I wanted to thank him. I reached his massive home and was greeted by his mom. “hey Jayla, Landon’s in the Music room. Just go right up.” She said. I smiled and walked up the stairs. I could hear the faint music playing. The door was cracked and I watched as Landon and his friends were playing. Landon was playing the guitar and in the front with a microphone. There was another boy on the drums, and another on the piano. I didn’t know the song they were  playing, but it had a nice beat.  Landon began to sing. “I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing

Just praying to a God that I don't believe in

'Cause I got time while she got freedom

'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't break even

Her best days will be some of my worst

She finally met a man that's gonna put her first

While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping

'Cause when a heart breaks no it don't breakeven... even... no

What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you,

And what am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok

I'm falling to pieces, yeah,

I'm falling to pieces”

He sang with so much passion, it scared me. I hadn’t noticed but Landon stopped singing and was looking directly at me. I opened the door and smiled awkwardly. “hey your mom let me in.” I said. 3 pairs of eyes were staring at me. The two boys stood. “we’re gonna go bro. see you later.” They said and nodded at me as they left. “sorry for intruding.” I said. Landon set his guitar down and took a seat at the piano bench. “It’s fine. So what’s up?” he said. “are you alright?” I asked. I felt as if he wasn’t. Maybe it was how he sang that song. “yea I’m fine.” He said. I didn’t believe him. “Alright. So how did things go with Rai?” I said, changing the subject. “She’s nice. I can’t believe you tricked me. You little devil.” He smiled. “You tricked me as well. So we’re even.”  I said. “so when are you gonna see her again?” I said. “I don’t know.” He said. I frowned. “What’s wrong.” I said. Something was bothering him. “I just don’t want to rush into anything yet.” He said. Landon looked me in the eyes. They looked sad. It broke my heart. “I see. I’m sorry Landon.” I couldn’t help but apologize for putting him in misery. “Its not you Jayla. Don’t beat yourself up.” He said, giving a small smile. “okay. But I hope you’ll be fine.” I knew he was just saying that to be nice and I didn’t want to upset him. “I will be.” He said and stood. “So what do you want to do my friend?” Landon smiled. “It’s up to you.” I said. I didn’t know what to do but anything would have been great. I was already missing Sebastian. “Lets go to Barnes and Noble.” He said. I shook my head. “okay. But no more buying a ton of books that we both can’t carry. Its ridiculous.” I chuckled. “Hey, there were a lot of good music books okay.” He smiled. “Sure sure. Let’s go.” I said and we headed out the door. It was nice hanging with Landon. It felt so normal.

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