Angsty Tony One-Shots

Tony vs Steve: the breakdown

The last command was still flashing on the screen before him. Blue blight the only thing illuminating a bruised and hollow face.

He couldn't even remember which of the many punches landed a bruise on his eye. It hurt but he wouldn't bother putting ice on it. Why would he?

The bottle was raised and pressed against chapped lips, pouring the last few drops down his throat. It was thrown, clashing against the wall and shattering.
Dumm-e rushed forward with a fire extinguisher. On any other day it would have brought out playful banter, a fond smile, perhaps even a chuckle.
Not today.

Yet another round of fighting. Another round of being the villain. The monster. The murderer.

It wasn't like he wanted to follow orders. But he had to.
He had to stop Bucky.

And Steve.
Oh god he had to stop Steve.

Every time they fought it got a little harder, until it became impossible. The world hated him already, the man who fought their national hero, but the couldn't hate him as much as he hated himself.

He drank more. And more.
And more.

With clumsy steps, barely able to stand, he let his metal cage surround him. The armour he once made to protect was now reduced to a weapon of destruction. A gun in the hands of a killer.

Iron Man flew above the clouds, not being able to think clearly, only hearing voices -his own voice- talking down.
He should have died in that portal.

He lands right before the Avengers base. He isn't an Avenger anymore. No one wants him. He doesn't even want him.

Once out of the suit he can barely stand. As he enters the building he sees guards walking up with their guns drawn. Oh yes... Of course... He was the bad guy now.

There was someone telling them to stand down. Steve.

The Captain walked over and catched Tony just as he was about to fall face first on the floor.
"Stark... What are you doing here?"
Not welcome. He was not welcome. Never welcome.

"I can't... Do thisss... Anymore..." Oh god he was slurring badly. The words felt sluggish in his mouth, it caused him real effort to push them past his lips.
He had to explain.

"You... You were my hero Steve...

I wanted to be strong... Like Captain America...
But worse... I wanted to be loved... Like Steve Rogers...

My dad loved you... so much...
He didn't love me...

I guess he only had enough room in his heart for one...
That's alright...
You deserved it more than I do...

Steve? I can't fight anymore.

You won.

I lose.

That's how it goes right?

The hero wins?
The villain loses?

I never wanted to be the villain.
I guess it's in my nature.

Was it when I built my first bomb? I only wanted to make my dad proud.
Or... Or maybe when I didn't stop building.
Definitely when I made Ultron. It was really my fault. I know I said it wasn't. But we both know it was.
I killed all those people.

They want me to stop you. At all costs they said.
But I can't do it Steve.

I'm too weak.
Useless."

Finally the words are out and he pushes Steve off so he can fall to his knees, looking up at the Captain. He's not even crying. He probably can't cry anymore. The bad guys never cry anyway.

"Please... Make it fast. I can't bare any more pain... Just...
Maybe...
You could forgive me...?
One day..."

Steve falls to his knees before the broken man and gathers him in his arms. Not speaking a word, just holding him with regret heavy in his heart.

This fight... This useless battle between friends...
It wasn't worth it. Never had been.
Not for one second.