sacrifices. [oikawa tooru x reader]

chapter 8

What doesn't kill you makes you wish you were dead.
Got a hole in my soul, growing deeper and deeper.
And I can't take one more moment of this silence.
The loneliness is haunting me.
And the weight of the world's getting harder to hold up.

The (Hair Color) haired girl sighed and directed her eye to the floor. Her headphones were on, and she was sitting on a bench at the park. She was thinking about her current situation.

She lost her best friend and her crush, found a comfort in a new friend, has rumors spread about her, and her life was a total disaster.

(Name) was trying to hold on, she really was. But she found herself slipping away, succumbing to the darkness.

She sat alone during lunch, and everywhere she went, there were echoes of whispers and accusing glares.

It comes in waves, I close my eyes.
Hold my breath and let it bury me.
I'm not okay, and it's not alright.
Won't you drag the lake and bring me home again?

(Name) honestly thought that she was no longer needed in anyone's life. She thought about her family. They would eventually move on right? Oikawa, Iwaizumi, and Kageyama would find someone else to replace her. And (Best Friend)? She already left her in the dust.

Who will fix me now? Dive in when I'm down?
Save me from myself, don't let me drown.
Who will make me fight? Drag me out alive?
Save me from myself, don't let me drown.

(Name) knew she was a mess. She knew Kageyama was the only one who made her smile, along with Karasuno. She thought about it. If Aoba Jousai was full of misery, why not escape to a new world?

She shook her head. She desperately wanted to clear her name, albeit she had no idea how. Maybe you could leave a mysterious and poetic sticky note on her empty desk about the truth and why she transferred.

It would be almost too easy.

What doesn't destroy you, leaves you broken instead.
Got a hole in my soul growing deeper and deeper.
And I can't take one more moment of this silence.
The loneliness is haunting me.
And the weight of the world's getting harder to hold up.

She contemplated her options. Either stay in Seijou and exist in misery or escape and live happily.

She chose the latter and decided to call her dearest companion, Kageyama Tobio.

It comes in waves, I close my eyes.
Hold my breath and let it bury me.
I'm not okay, and it's not alright
Won't you drag the lake and bring me home again?

"Ne, Kageyama, how do you transfer to Karasuno?"

Who will fix me now? Dive in when I'm down?
Save me from myself, don't let me drown.
Who will make me fight? Drag me out alive?
Save me from myself, don't let me drown.

(Name) was sitting cross legged at her desk, pencil in hand. She successfully filled out a piece of paper. She folded it in half and put it in her schoolbag. She knew her parents wouldn't mind, especially after informing them of the reasons. It comforted her that her parents were so supportive and fired up.

'Cause you know that I can't do this on my own.
(Woah oh oh oh)
'Cause you know that I can't do this on my own.
(Woah oh oh oh)
'Cause you know that I can't do this on my own.
(Woah oh oh oh)
('Cause you know that I can't do this on my own.)

She knew her new friends would help her. (Name) knew she was taking the cowardly way out, but maybe the cowardly way was the best way out in this situation. The girl turned on her phone, ready to call a certain black haired male. She paused.

(Best Friend's Name)

She deleted the number and continued to call her friend.

Who will fix me now?
Who will fix me now?
Who will fix me now? Dive in when I'm down?
Save me from myself, don't let me drown.

She realized, her true friends wouldn't let her drown in her own swarming mind.
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Wow this sucks. But really, this song fits this chapter and story in general. I swear I'm good at songfics but today's just not my day. Haha happy reading! What do you think will happen next? Comment your idea(s)!