Not really, fully, exactly dead (gmw/Lucaya)

Ch.6

The next day was Maya's birthday. Cory quietly wished her a happy birthday before many of the students entered the class. Riley was very upset and her eyes were red. Sophia turned away, not able to bear what she had done to her friend. Riley was mad at her parents for not being more upset that Maya was not alive for her birthday, also, but they weren't upset because she was alive. They were upset that their daughter was upset. Lucas asked Maya to come over that afternoon. They sat down together on his couch.
"You okay?"
"No."
"Oh."
"Remember that girl that everyone's mentioning?"
"Maya?"
"Yep."
"What about her?"
"It's her birthday."
"Oh."
"Is it okay if I can just talk about her to you? I really just need to talk to someone."
"That's what friends are for."
"I like you. But I don't know if that's because you are so much like her. Please don't be upset that I said that. I mean you're great and maybe I only liked Maya because she was like you. Either way, I'm confused. The first time I met Maya, she did this thing where she asked me out, said I don't pay enough attention to her and dumped me. All in like ten seconds. I don't think she thought that she was ever gonna see me again. I don't think she cared. I was in her history class. Her best friend really liked me and apparently so did she. We went to Texas together and thats when I found out. We started dating but then on new years, Our friend told everyone that she still loved me. I ended up with the other girl. I started to get annoyed that I could only think about Maya. I started being mean to her because blaming it on her was so much easier. I started calling her dumb, annoying, retarded. Then I got worse as other people joined in. It made me feel almost like I was doing the right thing. I said things like ugly and fat. Both such lies. She was flawless. She was tiny and she could make the ugliest face and still and still be beautiful. Like you."
"Thank you but I have a lot of flaws."
"Not physical." He didn't wait for her response. "Then it became things like calling her a slut. I stopped. Others didn't and I felt the pressure to start again. I slipped her a note one day. It read worthless. Two days later, she was gone. And then she died."
"It wasn't that."
"What?"
"I'm sure it wasn't."
"I just wish I could have had a second chance to explain myself and apologize. A second chance with her. A chance to tell her that I loved her."
"You loved her?"
"More than anything."
"What if you do have a second chance with her?"
"Don't you understand that? She's dead. Even if she was alive, she would never give me a second chance."
"Then what am I doing here?" She blurted out.
"What?"
"I-uh. I can't do this anymore."
"Look, I'm sorry that I got mad. Please, don't leave me." She pulled her sketchbook out of her bag and placed it on the coffee table. He flinched at the sight of it, pushing memories away. This was Sophia's. Not Maya's.
"I'm sorry. You might hate me after this, but you need to see what's in here. I need to talk to Riley about it too. Goodbye, huckleberry."
"Huckleberry?" He said uneasily.
"I know that Maya called you that. Sorry if it upset you." She stood up and walked out.
He lifted up the sketchbook and put it in his. He opened up to the first page. There was a drawing of the sky. One he recognized. His stomach turned as his eyes drifted to the signature.
Maya Hart
His head went light and his hands started shaking.
Maya. Maya. Maya. Sophia had Mayas sketchpad. Sophia who looked, sounded, and acted just like Maya. Because Sophia was Maya.