Overcoming My Father

Chapter 12

The not read:

Area,

I'd like to take you on a real date, what do you say? I had a really nice time with you at the party.

Chad.

He left his number at the bottom of the page so I could text him. My heart was pounding so hard in my head I couldn't hear myself think. Had I fallen for this guy already? I barely knew him, and already I couldn't help these hopeful feelings. and for the first time in my life, I wasn't thinking about my dad. I brushed aside my feelings of excitement and got my books for class. "Area! There you are!' Taylor yelled after me. "Hey, Tay," I said making my way towards her. She was putting her stuff away. She told me the new latest gossip she had heard this morning. As usual I was tuned out, but not because I was sad. I was extremely confused about my feelings for chad. She didn't notice I wasn't paying attention anyways, she was busy telling me all about whatever it was that she had heard. By the time lunch had hit, I was just as lost in my thoughts as before. Taylor and I got our trays and sat at our usual table. Suddenly, chad was there. He put his tray beside mine and sat with me. "Hey," he spoke sweetly. "Hey," I blushed. "So what do you say to going on a date? I never did get a text." He nudged me jokingly. My heart fell into my stomach and I had to focus so I could answer him. "I say, yes." I replied, trying to hide my smile. "Tomorrow night, 6?" He asked. "Sounds like a date," I winked. He laughed and got up. Once he was out of ear shot, Taylor freaked of course. I couldn't help these feelings of excitement flooding through me. I was trying so hard to fight them. I couldn't allow myself to get excited, that would only bring on disappointment. And even knowing this, I couldn't fight these feelings.

"Area, sit." My dad ordered when I walked through the door. Fear sprung through me, and I practically ran to a chair. "Where were you last night?" He asked, his tone sharp. "I was out." I snapped. He glared."you cannot talk to me like that young lady!" He yelled. "Actually, I can. I think I have the upper hand here dad." I spat my words at him and stormed off to my room. I sat on my bed, waiting for him to come in my room and hit me or something. He didn't, instead he left. I hoped he'd never came back. I fell to the ground breaking apart. The pain was gripping at my chest, pulling me deeper into the darkness. The pain was so bad, I found myself gasping for air. I couldn't take it anymore, I pulled out my razor and cut. I didn't stop until i couldn't possibly cut anymore. I wrapped a towel around the wounds and went to sleep.

My alarm rang loudly in my head. Morning already? It felt like I had just fallen asleep. I tried to get up and felt burning all over my body. Oh yeah! I looked down and saw the towels covered in my blood. Shit. I pulled them off, and the cuts were all closed, but there were many of them, too many. I went for a quick shower to wash off the dry blood, and continued my morning ritual of getting ready. Just as I was about to leave a familiar voice spoke behind me. "Our conversation from last night isn't over, have a nice day," my father said an gave me a creepy smile. I slammed the door, and bit my lip. I could hardly hold back the tears, but I had too. I had school and I couldn't cry there. I pushed all the intense painful emotions I was feelin deep down within myself. I couldn't let him get to me. What he said was in my mind all day, his words taunted me. It took everything in me, to pretend I was okay. I threw every ounce of strength I owned and threw it into my act. By the end of the day I was exhausted. But, I remembered my date. A small but noticeable part of me got really excited again. No! Area, don't get excited.

"So, you think you have the upper hand?" My dad taunted me. His evil smile clouding my mind. "I don't have time for your games dad. Back off!" I yelled at him, trying to push past him so I could go to my room. He pushed me against a wall, pressing his arm across my chest holding me in place. "I told out talk wasn't over, didn't i? This isn't a game you stupid girl. Remember what I told you in the hospital?" He threw his words at me so hard my eyes filled with tears. "Kill me then you jurk! Just kill me! I don't even want to be here, just do it!" I screamed an started to sob. He dropped his arm and I fell to the floor. He left, again. I laid on the floor sobbing until I remembered my date. I threw myself up and ran for the shower. I got myself ready, spending a little more time on myself than I do in the morning. I checked my clock, 5:55, crap. He'll be here soon. I sprayed perfume on and got my shoes. A truck pulled up and I went to meet him. "Hey," I sad softly as I sat in the passenger seat. "Wow, you look beautiful," he nearly whispered. My cheeks flushed red, and I smiled at him. "Where are we off to?" I asked excitedly. "Now, if I told you it wouldn't be a surprise would it?" He joked, giving me an innocent smile. I laughed.

He took me back to the field where we kissed that night at the party. This time there was a blanket laid out and a picnic basket. I smiled really big.

"Wow chad! This is great." I said looking into his eyes. I felt at home, safe even. I looked into his eyes, and saw everything I needed. I felt a tug on my heart, oh dear, I really was falling for him. I dropped my head and got out if his truck. He met me and grabbed my hand pulling me to the blanket. I sat so close I him, our legs were touching. It was distracting having him so close to me.

"Okay, so I brought, turkey sandwiches, chicken, and egg salad. I didn't know what you liked." He said sweetly. I grinned.

"Turkey please, you didn't have to go to all this trouble."

"It was no trouble for you. This is going to sound really stupid but, I feel like I've known you my whole life. When I look into your eyes it's like, like, I found what I want.." He blushed. I gasped. He felt the same way.

"It's not stupid, I feel the same way." I grabbed his hand and smiled at him. He looked up at me and grinned. He pulled me in for a kiss. It was urgent, and forceful, not that I minded. He moved his hand down to my lower back, and I froze. Slipping into a flashback. I wasn't with chad anymore. I was in my bed. My dad was there. "No! Please stop! Someone help me!" I screamed and started crying. It was no use, my dad didn't even hear me. "Please, please, stop!" I sobbed. "Area! It's me chad, snap out of it! Area!" Chad yelled. He pulled me right out of the flash back, but that didn't stop the tears from pouring out. He wrapped his arms around me, and held me while I cried. "I'm sorry.. I.. It wasnt.. You. I'm.. Sorry.. I-"

"It's okay area, you don't have to explain." He stopped me before I could finish. I sat up. "I want too." And I did. For what reason, I had no idea. I told him everything. I told him about the abuse, the threats, the suicide, the hospital, everything. He listened patiently, giving me reassuring nods when I needed them. And when I finished he just hugged me. He didn't say anything. He was perfect. On the way to my house is when he said something about it.

"Area, I really think you should report your dad. He won't hurt you, I won't let him. You can do it, you're a brave girl." He spoke softly.

"He'll kill me chad, he made that clear. I don't know. What if they don't believe me?"

"They'll believe you area, they will. You just need to stand up for yourself. You told me, and I believe you." He grabbed my hand.

"I don't know chad. I'll think about it." I said softly, hoping he'd drop it.

"Alright. And if you need me, let me know okay? You don't have to go through this alone." I started crying at his words. I was so glad to have him here, it honestly meant the world to me. I had someone on my side, for the first time in my life.