Untitled for now...

Chapter 17 - The Note

"October... October..."

"Melanie? Melanie where are you?" I can hear her calling me, but all I see is darkness...

"October, this is no time for sleeping."

What? "Melanie where are you?"

"October. Rise." My sweet Melanie's voice twists and distorts into my Father's, brimming with displeasure and impatience; Oh shit that's really him.

"October."

I lurch awake, "yes Father?" My eyelids are heavy as a ton of bricks but I force them to stay open.

"It is no time for sleeping, why are you in bed at such an hour? Your brother even showed concern, you have not moved since you arrived home from school yesterday and it is time for you to be on your way there now."

Fuck. I stumble out of bed while apologizing to my Father, "I-I I'm sorry Father, I just have this headache and my eyes can barely stay open, I am not making excuses simply trying to explain, I beg your forgiveness-"

"October stop." He cuts me off and I freeze where I stand with my jeans half pulled out of my drawer. "I have already called the school and informed them that you are in no condition to attend today, we need to talk regardless."

I drop the jeans back into the drawer and stand rigid too scared to breathe. "About what, sir?"

"Well... first off, tell me what is ailing you, what are your symptoms? You may need a Doctor."

I take my first breath in minutes, "Yes, well, I have a terrible headache making it impossible to think, blurred vision that comes and goes, I feel completely lethargic like merely standing takes too much effort, I have no appetite and am relentlessly exhausted... I am sure that it's merely a bug."

He leans back into a relaxed state and smirks, what is he thinking?

"I disagree dear daughter, you are not suffering from a bug of any kind, perhaps this will shed some light on you ailments..." He pulls an envelope out of his pocket and my heart drops, he has Melanie's note to me. "Read it October. I already have, but I assure you it was only out of concern for my only daughter."

I take it with my hands shaking and pull the piece of paper out...

~ October, 

I am so sorry, for everything, especially for writing this note. But I have to, there is no other way. Thank you for saving me as a child and for the years of friendship, I will be forever in your debt,. However, I can not be your friend anymore, or anything else for that matter. It could never be, and I have no interest in ever speaking to you again. Do not chase after me, just pretend that we are twelve again and I am boarding the train never to return. I am so sorry.

Love,

Melanie

"That's it..." I whisper barely speaking at all. I drop the letter to the ground and just stare blankly not sure that I can feel anything at all or that I ever will again. 

"October, I am so sorry, I feel that this is partly my fault... I should have never-"

"NEVER WHAT!? NEVER LISTENED TO ME AND KILLED HER?! WITH ALL DUE RESPECT SIR, DO NOT GO THERE." I have never raised my voice at my Father and the fear of his wrath that had kept me silent for so long was gone; he didn't get up though. He didn't do anything...

"I should have never sent her away October. Do you honestly think that I just listened to you that night so long ago because I felt the need to humor you? No, I have a reason for everything I do and I have failed. 

I sit down cross legged on the floor a foot away from the note and look up at my Father completely taken aback, "Failed at what?"

"...It will be of no help to go into that now, but just know that I am deeply sorry, and will do anything in my power to help you; though I haven't the faintest how much good I will be able to do now..." I have never seen him like this, the pain and shame written plainly across his proud and stern face...

"Father, please, tell me your reason for saving her that night." To my dismay he shakes his head and gets up from the foot of my bed. 

"October it is late, I must sleep or I will be too weak to hunt tonight. However, I will tell you, that you are my only daughter, nothing you could do would change that... Also, in this life we have many battles, you must choose which ones to fight carefully, and then fight with all your might, prowess, and resources." And with that he is gone.

I stand up my legs shaking beneath my weight and make my way over to my vanity. Does he really mean what I think he means? He couldn't... but he must...