Where My Demons Hide

Time Off For Good Behavior

Norm greeted me at the front of the bar the next night and walked with me to my station. It was Friday, our most profitable night and I was scheduled to work. Like always. It wasn't busy yet since I always came in early to make sure the bar was set up to my standards. I hated the other bartender that worked on my off nights, she would always rearrange everything and hide shit on me. I was the last one here, but since I was a mess when I left last night things weren't how I liked them.

"Sorry Meadow, I can't risk having you pull another stunt like last night. We could have lost a lot of money when you went down and I can't have you being so irresponsible."

I doubt my mouth could have hung down lower than it was at that moment.

"You have got to be shitting me, Norm. I literally passed out. Stunt?! Irresponsible? It's not like I was wasted and let the customers have free reign over the booze." My voice was getting louder but I couldn't control it.

"Meadow, listen, you're a good kid," I scoffed at him, I was 28, not quite a kid, "well, kid to me. Anyway, one day when you own your own business you'll get it. I can't have shit going down like last night. This place is all I've got. Me and The Short Straw."

He spoke about his bar like it was the love of his life. In some aspects, I guess it was. He had wanted to build something from the ground up since he was a kid and this was it for him. I learned all about it when I came for my interview, he sat me down and with a look of child like wonder in his eyes he walked me down memory lane. I'll spare the details, but this place had his actual blood sweat and tears sunk into it. Not to mention his life savings.

"Norm, c'mon, you talk like I'm not just as dedicated to this place as you are. Look at me, I'm here three hours early for my shift to make sure everything is perfect. This is my livelihood, too."

"Meadow, I know how you are kid, but it's not a risk I can take. I already called Justine to fill in for you," he said the last part quieter.

"That bitch must have been squealing with excitement, like the pig that she is," the disgust was obvious.

"Just take a few days, maybe a week and then come back. Get through whatever is going on and come back like nothing happened," obviously he wasn't going to comment on my pig reference. "Maybe you're coming down with something that will run it's course in a few days," the optimism in his voice was nauseating.

But in all honesty, he knew I was his best bartender. I saw his vision for The Short Straw and what he wanted as his bottom line and even though it was monotonous to me now, I still busted ass to help reach his goal.

"Yeah, sure. I'll call you in a couple days," I started for the exit, "Just please don't let Porky, I mean Justine, change everything around back there. You know how I am."

"That's my niece you're talking about, but I won't," he smiled fondly at me and waved as I went through the door.

By the end of my fourth day off, I was literally going crazy. There was not a particle of dust to be found. I had watched any intelligent show on Netflix and rearranged my movie collection by favorites. Which only pissed me off so I promptly returned it to alphabetical order, like it belonged.

The self inflicted prison sentence was taking a toll on me. My anxiety was at an all time high, my finger nails were the shortest they had been in a while and I was developing a small bald spot on the back of my head from pulling my hair out piece by piece. Thankfully that provided me with something new to do, pulling it out then cleaning it right up. My sleep schedule was completely backwards at this point, too. I was used to being up late anyway, what with working at the bar and all, but now I wasn't going to bed until the sun was coming up. It was easier to clear a nightmare from my mind in daylight than it was in darkness.