Look Closer | Mavi | Dreamingletters & LittleCarokind

3. I Feel You

Mitch's P.O.V

Sometimes I'm not sure what bugs me. Am I mad because of my date, or because I'm letting some asshole get me down?

I look up at Avi and feign a struggle to keep my composure. "I'm honestly okay Avi, I'm just having one of those days."

"If you don't want to talk about it, I have no problems with that." Avi is so understanding. Knowing that he cares is more than enough to clear my head of whatever negativity the date inflicted.

"Okay, y'know what? I'm going to open up to you, but you have to promise to keep this between us." He nodded his head as a warm smile pushed his beard further up his cheeks. "I haven't even talked to Scott about this..." I started, "but I've been feeling lonely lately. As if everyone is preoccupied and I am simply another arbitrary part of their day."

"It's okay to feel lonely sometimes Mitch, we're built to socialize. When no one gives you a sense of individual attention, it's easy to feel insignificant, even if you mean everything to someone else in your life." Avi enlightened me this time with his sudden wisdom.

"When did you have a conversation with Plato?" I asked jokingly, not even expecting Avi to have prior knowledge about philosophers.

"That's irrelevant. What's important is that you understand that your feelings are completely valid, and that people do care about you. I can't speak for anyone but myself, but I know that if you told me you needed a hug, I wouldn't ask why. I would just do it."

I feel my emotions have an Olympic triathlon in my stomach and soon my face goes a little red. "Avi?" I start.

"Yes Mitch?" He replies eagerly.

"I need a hug".

And with that, I feel a warm, understanding embrace. As I go to pull away, I feel that Avi hasn't let up a single bit, so I quickly throw my strength back into the hug. This is so nice of him. That's the only thought that comes to mind. I can't believe he's doing this for me.

We finally break the embrace and I let a small smirk grace my lips. We share an awkward 'we're just friends' glance and I quickly retreat to my phone. I open Twitter to tweet what any other single gay boy has at some point in his life; 'Straight boys are such a tease sometimes'. After I send out the tweet I look to my side to see Avi reading over my shoulder.

"Am I a tease?" He says, with a light, yet still prodding tone.

"I like to give our fans something to read too far into" I reply, half lying. I always tweet with purpose, but try to make things very vague to avoid potential drama. Avi means more to me than a typical friend would, and I can't deny that he's attractive, but I also have conditioned my brain to avoid attaching emotions to our friendship. I know that he could never like me like that, so I'm going to avoid heartbreak, thank you very much.

"I feel lonely too..." Avi abruptly brings us back to the uncomfortable topic. "Kevin is a great friend, but he's very independent, and I'm a social..."

"Butterfly" I interrupt on his awkward hesitation.

"To be honest, I didn't want to call myself a butterfly" Avi chuckled out the last few words. "I'm a social dragon, how about that?" He finally completed his thought.

"Clearly I can relate, maybe we can make these afternoons a thing? This was like therapy to me, I needed it. We start tour in a couple weeks, why not meet up for coffee a few more times before that?" I confidently propose, atypical of my character.

"I would like that" Avi replied with a welcoming smile. "Great! I'm looking forward to it. For now I think I'm going to head home to feed Wyatt, but I'll text you tomorrow and we can set up our next 'meeting'" I said joyfully.

Avi completely turned my mood around today, maybe even in general.

"I'll text you, thanks for coming over, Mitchie."

"No problem, big daddy" I replied with a subtle wink and left.

Driving home, I can't help but reflect on my day. There's no music this time, and I take the long way to give myself more time to think. The constant purr of the engine allows my brain to wander into my subconscious. We actually do have rehearsal tomorrow, that's bugging me. Avi made me feel special today, that's lifting my spirits. I don't know if I actually want to learn guitar, but I really enjoyed that jam session. I think I'll bring up a duet section at our next arranging session.

Once I step in the door, Scott actually is back already. It's only 1pm, so I guess Alex had somewhere to go that he wasn't aware about.

"Hey Samantha!" I hear him shout once he notices my presence.

"Hey, what happened to 'like 4'?" I asked. I'm genuinely curious about what Alex had to do, because I'm used to the pair being out for 1-2 days not 1-2 hours.

"He had a surprise visit from his Grandma, so I told him to invite her to lunch with us and that we'd have the date tomorrow." Scott explained.

That's sweet I guess, and maybe I could visit Avi again then. Our rehearsal is tomorrow night, after all.

"That's cute, how was it?" I say, trying to keep up the conversation.

"Pretty good, but extremely PG. We didn't even hold hands." He seems offended at his lack of public displays of affection today.

"I know the feeling, girl." I playfully sassed, though I'm a little bitter that he doesn't have my single struggles. "I'll be in my room if you need me, feed Wyatt okay?" I sneak in the last part because I'm currently on a cloud and would rather not deal with cat food right now. With that, I slip into my room and fall into the vortex that is tumblr.

The rest of the day flies by, and before I know it, I've had dinner and a midnight snack. Where did the time go? Oh that's right, tumblr. Even though my two cups of coffee today would argue otherwise, I probably should get some sleep. I prepare for bed and ponder whether or not to ask Avi to get coffee tomorrow morning. Not being able to decide, I type up the text and save it as a draft, so tomorrow morning I just have to hit send. Hopefully when I've had some sleep I can convince myself that there's nothing wrong with a platonic coffee date with a straight guy. Besides, that just felt right.

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A/N: So... Dreamingletters strikes again :) I love this part!

One little thing regarding our updates: We both try to update as frequently as possible, yet we're both rather busy right now. Please bear with us, even if there's more time between updates!