Look Closer | Mavi | Dreamingletters & LittleCarokind

12. Bunk Neighbours

Avi's P.O.V.

The last few days before our tour are a huge hoopla, as always. Although I am usually very organised and packing up my suitcases is more or less muscle memory, there are so many small things we need to take care of and it's tiring. Nevertheless I try my very best to keep my head up high as well as my mood. Although I was planning to, there really isn't any possibility to meet up with Mitch alone before tour anymore. That's why I make sure to seize every moment I have to talk to him. Even if it's just us being professional and talking about an arrangement, I focus solely on what he says and how he does it.

He's fascinating me more and more with every day that I get to witness him working. He's so passionate about everything and always tries to give 110%. Yet I notice his mood decay from day to day. He still tries hard to be the funny, sassy queen he always is but I am able to see through the façade, able to notice that the dark bags under his eyes go far beyond what his genes gave him. Somehow I'm worried about that and I really want to ask him if everything is alright. But I never really find the right moment to do so. There's always something going on, someone who wants to talk to either him or me. So it's back to watching from afar and being professional yet attentive around him.

~

"Avi? Are you coming? The uber is here!" Kevin's voice is loud and impatient.

"Just a minute, Kevin!" I call back and take a quick look around my room. Today marks the start of tour and I just need to check for anything I could have forgotten. Once I'm sure that everything I need for a few weeks on the road is either in one of the suitcases that are already on the bus or in the smaller overnight bag which holds everything I'm going to take on the bus, I join Kevin.

"Finally" he exclaims. "For a second I thought you'd stay at home!" He's already waiting outside of our house and locks the door before we walk to our uber.

"And leave you without your bass? Are you kidding me? Plus life without all of you around me would be boring!" Well... especially without Mitchie. I shake my head, willing the thought about our tenor away and throw my bag into the trunk of our uber before getting into the car.

As we make our way down the road away from home, I suddenly panic. Were all the windows closed? What about the alarm system, did we turn it on? What about the trash? "Kevin, did you check the-"

"Windows, stove, alarm, trash? Yep. And there's nothing in any cupboard or in the fridge. It's not our first tour after all" Kevin states and eyes me suspiciously. "You've been off for the past few days! What's wrong with you?"

I try to look at him as if everything was alright. "N-nothing. Just a little bit nervous, I think. The tour is going to be huge!" And I have to stand being close, yet professional around Mitch for the next weeks. No possibility to get closer and no possibility to forget about him and whatever feelings are hidden somewhere in a dark corner of my brain.

I can sense that Kevin doesn't really buy what I'm saying, but he knows better than to keep bothering me. See, that's what I like about him. He's always helpful, always there when you need someone to talk to, but also respectful if you don't want to talk.

We arrive at the studio half an hour later and I hear Kevin gasp. "Oh my... that's crazy? Is that ours?"

I pull myself from my thoughts and look out of the window, being gobsmacked when I see what he means: A bus. The biggest one I've ever seen. It's huge. Truly. Damnit!

"I thought it would be only the five of us on that bus" I say while I absentmindedly get out of the car and get my bag. I still can't believe my eyes. The rest of the crew is already on their way to the first venue on a second bus to set everything up.

"Look, Kirstie's already on board" Kevin exclaims, pointing at the bus. "It is ours!"

"Come on, you have to see this! It's huge" the bubbly blonde calls over from the door.

Kevin and I make our way over to her and enter the bus. It has a lounge area directly at the front, big enough for the five of us, a small kitchen, a door, probably leading to the toilet and a sliding door to separate the lounge area from the bunks.

"It's huge, isn't it?" Scott comes through said door and sinks down on the sofa. "Mitch is on board, too, he needs a bit more sleep, though, so maybe you should wait until later to choose your bunk, you know the queen..." He rolls his eyes,

"It's awesome!" Kevin still looks around mesmerised but then decides to sit down with Scott and Kirstie. They look at me questioningly, probably waiting for me to sit down as well.

I could be alone with Mitch. Talk to him when he wakes up. My feet carry me over to the sliding door. "I'll take a nap. Haven't slept too well" I quickly lie and step into the dark cabin.

"Scott, I told you I'm okay! I just want to take a nap goddamnit" I hear Mitch hiss from one of the top bunks.

"Calm down, Mitchie. It's just me. I figured, I could use a nap, too" I say soothingly.

I hear rustling and then the lamp in Mitch's bunk is turning on. "The bunk across from mine is free. We could be bunk-neighbours" he offers as he's opening the curtain.

Mitch smiles at me, showing his perfect white teeth and although I hate sleeping in a top bunk I get out of my shoes and swing up into the empty space. I get comfortable and turn to look at Mitch.

"Hi..." he says with a small voice.

"Hey..." I return, not knowing what else to say. All of a sudden I'm feeling utterly nervous. Mitch is only a metre away from me and the prospect of being that close to him for multiple weeks makes my heart beat quicker.

Close, but not close enough. Not as close as we were that night. The night when we revealed our feelings, when I told him about the staircase and we made the first step by cuddling and talking. And although I'm still not sure if I'd be brave enough to climb said staircase, there's this voice inside my head that won't shut up about the beautiful tenor lying in the bunk opposite of mine. 

"Shall we go there?"

I focus back on him, he must've been talking for a while but I just zoned out. "Sorry, come again, please?"

Mitch giggles. "I just wanted to ask if you'd like to go to the other lounge area in the back. It's not as huge as the one in the front but comfortable enough for the two of us."

I raise an eyebrow. "What about napping?"

"Not that important as my desire to spend a few minutes alone with you on our staircase, Daddy" he says, sounding almost too casual and jumps down from his bunk. 

I climb down from my bunk and follow Mitch through the sliding door to the back of the bus.

It's just as Mitch has described. A smaller lounge with a TV and a sofa big enough for maybe three people. Mitch flops down and pets the couch beside him.

"So..." I utter as I sit down next to him, leaving some space between us. I know that I should finish the sentence but I can't come up with something intelligent.

"Yes, Avi? What's on your mind? Enlighten me!" Mitch smirks at me. Does he know what's going on in my brain?

"It feels good to have some us-time" I say honestly, my eyes flickering up to meet his brown orbs, mesmerised by the way they're sparkling in the dim light of the tourbus.

"It does" Mitch agrees, smiling happily. "Although it will be rare with the others around."

I smile back at him. "So we should seize it, shouldn't we?" I propose, hoping he would come up with something fun to do.

And I am hoping that this moment will last a while, because I really missed spending time with him. I'm always doubting myself when it comes to him, but as soon as he is around it feels better, kind of right, actually. There's still a long ascent lying in front of us and I'm not sure if we'll make it at all, but as he said, I'll try to enjoy the moment as much as humanly possible.

~~~~~~~~~