Tana's POV
"How long left? I can't stand waiting anymore.." Suspense taking over my mind, these are the longest minutes ever! I'm sure anyone would agree with me.
"30 seconds.." My best friend, Megan, replies. She's in the bathroom while I'm sitting on her blue king sized bed looking at the pictures on the tables and walls.
Megan's husband took their three daughters and son out to the park and afterwards to go to the ice-cream parlor. He said they'd be out for a while so Megan and I could catch up and spend some well needed time together. Brandon's looking after the boys today, he told me to get out of the house to have a break. I told him I didn't needed it, but he insisted.
"You ready sweetie?" Megan walks out of her en-suite.
I nod my head ready to hear what was to come next.
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Later that night..
I lay awake in bed, it's 1:30am, I haven't slept a bit and I'm trying to figure out how I'm supposed to tell him. Brandon fell asleep at 10:30pm, he was really tired tonight, having to look after the boys all day by himself no doubt. I haven't chosen my words yet, they're jumbbled in my head but I'm realising it's time that he knows. My gorgeous husband, Brandon, lays fast asleep in dreamland, with no realisation of what's going through my mind. How scared I am, he has no idea, I haven't told him anything. I'm not sure if I can go through this again, but if I tell him what I'm feeling, it'll break his heart. We're supposed to make this decision together, but I know what I want and this isn't it.
Hours later, I wake from a restless night of sleep, tossing and turning every time I tried to close my eyes. I get out of bed and walk into our bathroom and get into a cold shower to help me think, leaving Brandon to sleep.
About twenty minutes later, I get out, wrapping a white soft towel around my chest, letting it fall down to my legs, covering my body. Seeing Brandon sleep in just his boxers, with his body spread out on the bed because he has more room to himself. My God, he looks so comfortable and I would usually want to go and cuddle him until one of the boys need me, but I'm not feeling it today, it's a weird feeling I have right now. I walk into our closet, scanning my bright blue eyes over all the clothes I have. I dress myself in my underwear and grab a pair of long sweatpants from one of my drawers and a over-sized green tee shirt, all comfortable, trying to relax my body.
All my boys are fast asleep, I wouldn't want to wake them from their sleep, especially with how cute and comfy they looked when I saw them all this morning. I'll let them rest their eyes until Brandon wakes so he can help me take care of them. I slowly take steps down the stairs and into the kitchen, making myself a cup of tea. I'm not that hungry this morning, I'll just stick to the fluids. After my cup is full, I walk into the living room, turning the 60" TV on, Brandon had it for his birthday from Ronnie, I swear they're secretly married and not willing to tell anyone about their secret love afair. E News! is the only good thing on right now, so I'll stick to it until something else comes on.
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5 days later..
I need to tell him now more than ever. I need to tell him how I'm feeling so he can help me through this, he's the only person I need now, he's the only person who will really understand. I call his name. No answer, I call it again, same response, nothing, but then I hear his beautiful vocal voice coming from down the hall so I walk into his music room. He's sitting at his keyboard, with his back facing me, he has his headphones covering his ears, singing along when his fingers hit the keys. An acoustic version of When You Were Young. His voice his beautiful, it's soothing, something you could listen to for hours. I walk to him and gently tap his back with the tips of my fingers making him jump.
He pulls his headphones off & puts his hand over his heart, turning to me. "Why did you do that?" He chuckles, standing up placing a small kiss on my lips. He sits back down smiling and it makes my heart melt. Why has he got to be so cute?
I go over and sit on the double brown leather couch, crossing my legs on the material, feeling it with my hands. I look up at him, not much expression on my face, but closer to a pout than a smile, my heart has dropped to my stomach, I'm so nervous to tell him, why the hell am I so nervous? I've done it twice before! What's so different about this time?
"What's wrong with you?" He asks, turning on his chair to face me, resting his masculine hands on his blue jeans. "You're not acting like your usually self, is something wrong baby?" His big brown eyes stare into my blue ones.
I take a deep breath, feeling a lump in my throat. I feel tears but I fight them back, I hate crying in front of him, so I won't. "I need to talk to you about something.."
He sits down next to me wrapping his arm around my waist, before pulling me on his lap and kissing my cheek. He gently runs his hand up and down my back, trying to comfort me.
"Tell me baby.." He almost whispers because he knows I'm upset. He brushes his long finger across my cheek and brings my hand up to his face and kisses my knuckles.
"I'm pregnant..and I don't know how to feel about it. I don't know if I'm happy or sad.." I look down at my stomach, not wanting his thoughts anymore.
"You're pregnant?! Baby that's amazing!" He almost jumps in exitement, hugging me tight, before pulling away knowing that there's a tiny person growing inside me.
"Why aren't you exited baby? We're gonna have a baby!" He continues his sentence taking a breath.
"I don't know. I'm not even sure if I want a baby right now. I don't feel ready. I want to wait longer before getting pregnant again.." I explain.
"Well you're not getting an abortion!" He raises his voice at me.
Hey there! Comments, feedback is appreciated. Ideas for the next chapter is welcome. Comment your thoughts on this, your favorite part perhaps? I love to know what you guys think!
Be expecting more updates, with a new story line, there's more to write on. No more waiting a few months.
