Caspar misses joe. It's ridiculous. He tells himself that change is good and that he'll be okay. Joe will be okay. Their friendship will be okay. But who is he kidding? Nothing is fine. Ever since he moved out, things fell apart. Everyone knew something was going on between them except Jaspar themselves.
They hooked up once, horribly drunk, and decided never to bring it up in a conversation. Well, that was until they both got drunk...again and Joe told Caspar to hold him because he wanted some warmth. They started off cuddling which led to making out and you know the rest.
It's been at least a couple of times since they've hooked up whilst being drunk. They knew it was wrong but at the same time, they didn't really care. Whenever they woke up the next day, they'd shrug it off.
But Caspar grew feelings for Joe. And dammit, he didn't want to.
Now he's all alone in his new apartment, unsure if he should call Joe.
Was that weird? He didn't know. It felt as if they had just broken up and decided to stay friends. Again, it's ridiculous. They were just roommates.
Who had sex multiple times.
Josh decides to check up on Caspar. He knows that his best friend is taking the current living situation hard. He couldn't blame him at all. He also knew about the fling they had going on. Josh wasn't stupid. He knew that his best friend had feelings for him. Josh didn't care if Caspar liked girls or guys or both, as long as he was happy, then so was Josh.
When Josh arrives at the apartment, Caspar is laying face down on the couch with his legs up in the air.
"Um, mate you okay?"
Caspar groans. "Yeah. Tired. That's all." he slowly sets his legs down and sits up, giving Josh some room to sit. "Forgot I gave you a copy of my keys."
"Buddy, are you sure you're okay?" Josh frowns, making his way towards his best friend and takes a seat next to him. "You're acting different."
"Me different? Oh you!" Caspar punches his shoulder playfully. Then he sighs. "No, I'm not fine."
Bingo.
"Wanna talk about it?"
"There's nothing to talk about. Joe's fine and I should be too. We were going to move out sooner or later."
This was true. They were planning on moving out a long time ago, but they kept putting it off because they wanted more time with each other.
"Yeah but you're allowed to be sad. You were roomies for two years." Josh slings an arm around Caspar's shoulder, giving it a squeeze.
Caspar frowns, looking at his best friend. "I don't want to be sad. I shouldn't be. He hasn't even texted me or called me."
"Have you tried calling him?"
"I try to but I stop myself. What if he doesn't want to talk to me?"
Josh rolls his eyes, shrugging his arm off of Caspar. "You two are so stupid. Joe wont call first because he doesn't want to show any emotion. You don't want to call because you will show emotion. God, just make out already."
-
Joe bites his lip, looking at his phone.
Caspar Lee wants to FaceTime...
Should he answer? Should he decline? Would it make him a pussy if he decides to turn off his phone?
Joe makes himself comfortable on his bed before answering the call. He holds up the device a little far from his face.
The second he sees Caspar's face, he lights up.
"Hi buddy." Caspar says, a smile forming on his face.
"Caspar! How're you, mate? How's...how's the, um, place?"
"Oh. Yeah, it's great. I have a cinema inside. It's really cool, you should come by sometime."
Joe feels a pang of jealousy hit him. He doesn't know why. "Yeah, I'd love to."
A silence hits between them. Caspar clears his throat. "Are...are we okay? I mean, are you okay?"
Joe nearly chokes on his saliva. "P-pardon?"
Caspar huffs in frustration. "Look, Joe. I'm going to be honest with you. Not living with you sucks, it really does. I keep thinking I'm going to find you next door every time I find something cool on Twitter. Then, I realize we live minutes away from each other. We haven't talked since I moved out and you're just awkward with me. Was I that bad of a roommate that you don't even want to talk to me?" he asks, his voice breaking.
"What? No!" Joe replies quickly, using his free hand to push back the few strands of hair that kept falling to his face. "That's...that's not true at all. You were great, in fact. I just...I don't know. I haven't talked to anyone. Oli's tried to come around but I ignore it. Even Conor, Jack, and Mikey have tried." he takes a second to really look at Caspar. He notices that the normal spark in his eyes is gone. He doesn't have the natural glow he usually has and he can see how Caspar is hurt.
Step up your game, Suggy.
"I'm sorry." Joe blurts out. "I'm sorry that I haven't checked up on your or your place. I'm sorry that you probably think I don't care about you, which is the complete opposite. I care about you, Caspar. I don't ever talk about my feelings because...I just don't like it. It makes me feel weak. It's always been a problem and you know that." he pauses. "I've been taking this really hard and I know you have, too. Maybe more than me, who knows. Point is, right, I miss you."
Caspar's eyes widen, his cheeks turning a bright shade of pink. "Y-you do?"
Joe rolls his eyes. "Of course I do, mate. We've been roommates for blimmin' ages! I haven't heard your stupid laugh or Josh's," he quickly adds the last part, "a-anyway, can I come over now? I just finished editing some vlogs. The Internet has been slower ever since you left."
"So you're using me for my Wi-Fi?" Caspar jokes.
"Course. Why else?"
"See you in a few?"
Joe nods, smiling. "In a few, buddy."
-
"I told you it was going to work out!" Josh says with a smug face.
Caspar pushes Josh off the couch. "Leave. I don't want you here when Joe comes."
"Why? So you two can cuddle? Make out?"
"5...."
"Caspar, you're not serious." Josh laughs, slowly getting up from the floor.
"4...."
"Caspar." Josh repeats, rubbing his elbow.
"3...."
"Fine! I'm going, I'm going. Tell Joe he's got himself a keeper. Well, whenever you two finally admit your feelings for each other." Josh teases one last time before he actually leaves.
Caspar lays his head back, smiling once again. Timing is everything.
-
it's been ages and i've just been really tired and sad and stressed out :-( BUT i promise i'm okay! i'm a lot better than i was two months ago.
anyways i hope you're all doing great and you enjoyed this one shot i figured we all needed this bc of them moving out aw
i just freaking realized this hit 22k views haha i'm fine i promise i'm not crying
seriously, thank you so much for viewing this lil book. it means the world to me. :-)
