Sleepwalking

Chapter 10- Athena

I texted him before I got home. I don't know what was wrong with me. I tell myself I did the right thing by closing myself off from the man with the guns and the scars and the dried blood under his fingernails. The man everyone cringes at the thought of, except for me. The man I said "I love you" to, and truly meant it.

I got to my apartment I share with my brother, BJ.

Beau Jr, who goes by BJ, is well spoken for a 18 year old boy from Ludendorff. Since he is still in high school, I sheltered him from my violent behaviour as I led him to believe I was done with being a thief. He stayed with me rather than go back to our birth parents for a few reasons. 1. Our parents were assholes. 2. He is too smart to stay in Ludendorff for his whole life, and 3. I wasn't going to stay no matter what, and he wanted to protect me. He didn't think I could protect myself, which he was mistaken about. I always carried a gun, and have killed 5 people. He only knew about 2..

The first time I killed someone, it rolled off of me like it wasn't a big deal. Running with Trevor, killing was a normality. It was a shot to the head, a silent death using a sniper from a rooftop, my victim on the ground. He told me I wouldn't need to gun besides for spotting him, but desperate situations call for desperate measures.

The second was entirely different. Killing someone with your hands is personal, with a gun it is not. It's like shooting an elk, which is meaningless until it's not. If you look at it as a person with feelings, if doesn't come off that way. If i hadn't of shot, I would be dead. I've I hadn't stabbed him 3 times, he would have done the same to me, and I would be dead and unable to help Trevor. But when you are propped up on a dead body, a lifeless cold, body, you see a person. Not like the man on the roof who wanted to shoot me dead. The man who wanted to strangle me had a family, a wife, parents, children. What makes it worse was that I knew him.

As far as BJ knows and ever will know, those are the only people I've killed. It's strange to people who think that killing 5 people, you would be used to it. But you never do. Unless you are Trevor.

He was on our team. He realized the odds of us actually getting money out of the job, and he got greedy.

"If we are only getting ¼ the take each and the take it only 2 G's, I'm getting what I earned." And he pulled out his pocket knife and stalked towards Trevor, who peered out the window through his sniper lens.

He wasn't paying the guy any attention. We were already down a guy, all that was left was Trevor, me and Kyle.

Kyle was a dick, we picked him up somewhere in liberty city. Trevor will do a job with anyone as long as he gets paid. I thought it was a bad idea. He was a war veteran, old and creepy.

I lunged onto his back and swatted the knife from his hands, out of reach.

He elbowed me in the stomach, and I yelped. Trevor turned, "Athena! What the fuck are you two doing." He saw us struggling. He raised the gun, but was out of ammo. He kicked the knife to my hand, which I grabbed and stabbed Kyle in the chest, three times.

He yelped and pounded on me hard until he couldn't anymore. "Get your whore off of me, T."

"Don't call me that." Trevor said before helping me to my feet. I was trembling, until Trevor picked Klye up and tossed tim out of the building. He fell 4 stories.

Trevor picked me up, and I wrapped my legs around his waist, and my arms around his neck.

"Come on A, we just gotta get to the roof." He squeezed me tight and I nodded, silently crying before my feet touched the ground again. My legs gave out beneath me and I fell to the ground. He helped me back up and plead, "Not now, A. You can't do this right now."

I don't think he understood the pain. Kyle was a prick and deserved what came back to him. But I vowed to never kill anyone, and I did it. I didn't even know the name of the first person I killed. Trevor said he thought it was better that way. You can't dehumanize someone with a name, at least it is harder to. Kyle was a monster, rage overcame him and desperate means for survival appeared in his brain.